After Jacqueline Spencer’s husband, David, was cared for at Pilgrims Hospice Canterbury in 2015, she now dedicates a sunflower in his memory as part of the charity’s Sunflower Memories campaign.
Here, Jacqueline shares how this helps her to remember David and come together with others who have experienced Pilgrims’ care.
David was a keen gardener and loved being outside pottering around and feeling the fresh air on his face. After he had an epileptic fit in his thirties, he was unable to work and so our roles reversed. David became a house husband, raising our two children Tami and Neil, looking after the house and cooking lots of delicious meals. He came from a big family and was one of 16 children!
He was a real home-loving man, although we loved our holidays too. We travelled a lot together once the children had grown up, visiting Kenya, Bali, Sri Lanka, Gambia and India, to name a few. It was always important to us to make lots of memories and to see the world together.
Sunflower Memories is such a lovely day, where you can take time to remember your loved one whilst being surrounded by others who have gone through the same thing. You don’t even need to say anything to each other, there’s just a silent understanding of what each other has gone through and all of the emotions that come with it.
Jacqueline
In August 2014, David was diagnosed with lymphoma of the brain and taken to a specialist hospital up in London. He would spend almost the next year of his life there on an isolation ward receiving treatment. Although he was cared for wonderfully, David missed the outdoors and his beloved garden. On the 23 July 2015 we celebrated our 38th wedding anniversary at the hospital, and the day after David was transferred down to the hospice in Canterbury.
David had said he just wanted to go home, and whilst the hospice wasn’t our home, it felt so much more like it. He had his own room with doors that opened out onto the beautiful gardens, and this made all the difference to him. He seemed so at peace whilst at the hospice, and was able to feel the fresh air on his face once again. It was such a pleasant and calm environment for all of us to be in and so much easier to visit David.
The hospice was just the most a welcoming place for the whole family to be; on one occasion, David’s 8-year-old niece, Amelia, came to visit him. It was so lovely to have her there and she didn’t feel scared or upset at all as the hospice allowed her to relax, have a go on the piano, and play with the toys they provide. Everyone could just act as naturally as they would at home, and feel comfortable in doing so. It’s all of these little extra things and the lengths the staff go to, which make the hospice such a special place. Nothing was ever too much trouble, we were always kept updated about David’s condition and were allowed to stay overnight with him whenever we wanted.
I attended my first Sunflower Memories day in 2018 with my daughter and son-in-law, having previously attended the Trees of Love service. Sunflower Memories is such a lovely day, where you can take time to remember your loved one whilst being surrounded by others who have gone through the same thing. You don’t even need to say anything to each other, there’s just a silent understanding of what each other has gone through and all of the emotions that come with it. The care provided by the hospice is simply amazing – even at the Sunflower Memories days you are truly looked after and still made to feel special by the staff and volunteers.
I’m looking forward to attending Sunflower Memories once again this year, and to taking my special sunflower plaque for David home with me to keep.
Sunflower Memories events will take place at our hospices in July 2019:
If you or someone you know is coping with a life limiting illness and you think you may benefit from Pilgrims free services, talk to your GP or Healthcare Professional about your options or click here to read about our Wellbeing and Social Programme.
5th June 2019
Herne WI’s donation with a difference
Members from the Herne Women’s Institute visited Pilgrims Hospice Canterbury with baskets and boxes of wonderful toiletries to donate.
The gifts have been collected by the WI group members since January and have been generously given to Pilgrims to support the fundraising team in raising important funds for hospice care. The community-based organisation for women celebrates its 100th year in east Kent with countless charitable acts undertaken and friendships made.
Mary Jewiss, Sheila Trewinnard, and Jane Heminway brought along the donations which were gratefully received by Pilgrims fundraising team, Leila Ilkhan and Lydia Todd, and Hospice Services Manager, Adrian Matthews.
Mary from the WI said: “We’re very pleased to support our local Pilgrims hospice, it is such a well-known and much-loved local charity which touches the hearts of so many of us.
“The response from our members to our appeal was amazing, we were all able to make a contribution and we’re very happy knowing our gifts will really help to make a difference to people who need Pilgrims care.”
The ladies were delightful and so enthusiasic about supporting Pilgrims.
Lydia – Pilgrims Hospices
Mary explained: “The group meets once a month, it’s a great way to make new friends and socialise but more importantly being part of an organisation that helps within the community is very special.
“We love to catch up with tea and a good natter and keep ourselves busy knitting, baking, crafting and so much more while sharing time with friends.”
Lydia Todd, Pilgrims Community Fundraising Officer, said: “The ladies were delightful and so enthusiastic about supporting Pilgrims. The lovely collection of toiletries is a wonderful addition to our tombola parcels for the Canterbury Vintage Tea and Fair, which will take place on Sunday 21 July in the Westgate Gardens in Canterbury.
“We hope the Vintage Tea will attract lots of visitors to come and enjoy a leisurely afternoon with music and refreshments, gifts and so much more. The support from the WI ladies will help us to raise even more money on the day.
“We wish to send a huge thank you to all of the WI ladies from Herne for helping us with their generous gifts. We hope to see some of you in the beautiful Westgate Gardens for our summer tea party with a vintage twist.”
We are planning to support Pilgrims with some good home-made baking for Vintage Tea.
Jane – Herne WI
WI member Jane said: “The three of us are now retired, and enjoy having time to dedicate to the Women’s Institute key campaigns and initiatives. We are planning to support Pilgrims with some good home-made baking for Vintage Tea.”
If you would like to find out more about supporting a fundraising activity, volunteering to help at the Vintage Tea or baking a cake to be sold at the cream tea and cakes Vintage Tea cafe, please call Lydia or Leila 01227 812 621 or email fundraising@pilgrimshospices.org.
If you or someone you know is coping with a life-limiting illness and you think you may benefit from Pilgrims support, talk to your GP or Healthcare Professional about the options or click here to read about our Wellbeing and Social Programme.
Holly: “I’m pleased to volunteer for a local charity that does so much within our community”
Holly Swan from Aylesham is a busy mum, student and research intern at Canterbury Christ Church University but still makes time to support Pilgrims Hospices as a volunteer.
Holly found herself becoming involved as a volunteer when she spotted a Pilgrims fundraising event that piqued her interest. She said: “I’ve always expressed an interest in how charities organise and manage fundraising events; I saw the festive Santas on the Run, it looked really fun and I wanted to get into the Christmas spirit by giving my time.
Pilgrims is truly a safe haven of support for people at the end of their lives. Importantly, that support extends to patients’ families and friends who may need help and guidance when caring for loved ones.
Holly
“I volunteered to help with the event registrations on the day, it was a great way to meet new people and to feel like part of the Pilgrims team was something really positive. It was great being able to give the Santas a smile and some encouragement before their run.
“There are so many amazing people doing so much to support our local hospice, it’s brilliant to be involved with the fundraising events, I’m hoping to help with Divas on Wheels and several other events this year.
“It’s apparent from the supporters I’ve met and from personal experiences spoken of by my husband and his family, Pilgrims is truly a safe haven of support for people at the end of their lives. Importantly, that support extends to patients’ families and friends who may need help and guidance when caring for loved ones.
“I’m pleased to volunteer for a local charity that does so much within our community.”
Tell us your volunteer story on social media by using the hashtags #PilgrimsLife and #VolunteerVoices.
Volunteers’ Week is a chance to say thank you for the fantastic contribution millions of volunteers make across the UK. It takes place 1-7 June every year and is an opportunity to celebrate volunteering in all its diversity.
We’re accredited by REVAMP, a quality mark for Volunteer Involving Organisations developed by Stronger Kent Communities, a leading provider of support for the voluntary sector in Kent.
Lorraine: “Pilgrims is a service we all may need at some point”
Lorraine Ludlow from Herne Bay chose to volunteer for Pilgrims Hospices after her dad, Peter Jury, was cared for at the Canterbury hospice in 2013.
Lorraine was a teacher at Canterbury College for many years but retired when she was diagnosed with cancer. She had successful treatment, and whilst donating some of her dad’s things to a Pilgrims shop she saw they were looking for volunteers. So, she decided to get involved.
Volunteering for Pilgrims is great, you’ll feel appreciated and it’s so worthwhile – you’re doing your bit to give back to a service we all may need at some point.
Lorraine
She said: “I’m a people person and there’s such a lovely community spirit within the shops. I wanted to give something back after what Pilgrims did for my dad, and I knew it would also give me something to focus on after my cancer treatment.
“It’s great working with volunteers across different areas, it’s so varied – you never know what’s going to happen. Sometimes you get these gems come in and it’s like a treasure hunt! It’s nice having a role I really enjoy.”
Although she knew about Pilgrims’ three hospices and some of its shops, through volunteering Lorraine learnt about the wider services available for patients and families. She added: “There’s so much more to it than just the very end of life. The support of the community is fantastic and surprised me, too. People are so generous.”
Asked why others should get involved, Lorraine said: “Volunteering for Pilgrims gives you a sense of belonging, the shops especially are like a little community. Everyone looks out for each other, it’s very social.
“It’s great, you’ll feel appreciated and it’s so worthwhile – you’re doing your bit to give back to a service we all may need at some point.”
Tell us your volunteer story on social media by using the hashtags #PilgrimsLife and #VolunteerVoices.
Volunteers’ Week is a chance to say thank you for the fantastic contribution millions of volunteers make across the UK. It takes place 1-7 June every year and is an opportunity to celebrate volunteering in all its diversity.
We’re accredited by REVAMP, a quality mark for Volunteer Involving Organisations developed by Stronger Kent Communities, a leading provider of support for the voluntary sector in Kent.
Sherie: “It’s a perfect way to meet new friends and try something new”
Sherie Jacques from Ramsgate volunteers as a Catering Assistant at Pilgrims Hospice Thanet. After her mum was diagnosed with lung cancer last year, Sherie gave up full-time work to become her carer. As her mum stabilised, Sherie found she had some spare time and decided to volunteer for her local hospice charity.
Volunteering offers Sherie a flexible way to keep busy and give back to the community whilst still being able to care for her mum. She said: “One day, my friend sent me a link to a skydive fundraiser on the Pilgrims Facebook page. I’ve been interested in doing one for a while, though I haven’t quite got there… yet!
“From there I went on to Pilgrims’ website and found the volunteer section. I originally applied for a reception role, welcoming people into the hospice, but then discovered that volunteers were needed in the kitchen. I had catering experience and knew the role would be challenging and keep me busy.”
I never get bored. Everyone is so nice and welcoming, and I feel I’m really doing something to help not only the hospice staff but the patients, too. I get to have a laugh with everyone and there is always a thank you at the end of each shift.
Sherie
Sherie volunteers twice a week and loves her varied shifts. She added: “I never get bored. Everyone is so nice and welcoming, and I feel I’m really doing something to help not only the hospice staff but the patients, too. I get to have a laugh with everyone and there is always a thank you at the end of each shift. Sometimes a new recipe or twist on an old favourite even gets tried at home.”
Asked what she’s learnt about hospice care and if she’d recommend volunteering to others, Sherie said: “There is so much going on at the Pilgrims; activity days, counselling, fundraising events to name just a few. It goes without saying that they are there for the patients primarily but offer so many services to carers and families as well. Oh, and the food is pretty amazing too!
“If you’re looking to volunteer there are so many things that you can help with, from driving, reception shifts, gardening, flower arranging, catering or even in the shops. The kitchen is my favourite, of course! It’s a perfect way to meet new friends and try something new.”
Tell us your volunteer story on social media by using the hashtags #PilgrimsLife and #VolunteerVoices.
Volunteers’ Week is a chance to say thank you for the fantastic contribution millions of volunteers make across the UK. It takes place 1-7 June every year and is an opportunity to celebrate volunteering in all its diversity.
We’re accredited by REVAMP, a quality mark for Volunteer Involving Organisations developed by Stronger Kent Communities, a leading provider of support for the voluntary sector in Kent.
Betty helps Pilgrims Hospices Lottery fund local hospice care
90-year-old Betty Rye from Cheriton has been a volunteer lottery collector for 17 years, helping Pilgrims Hospices Lottery to raise vital funds for local palliative care.
Back in 2002, Betty was asked if she’d like to volunteer for Pilgrims as a lottery collector in the building where she lives. She took to the role immediately, and it fits in perfectly with the sociable lifestyle she enjoys with fellow residents.
She said: “It’s a brilliant way to get involved with a great cause. My brother had cancer so I thought Pilgrims was a good charity, and some of my friends have personal connections, too. I’m happy we’re doing this for Pilgrims.”
It’s a brilliant way to get involved with a great cause. My brother had cancer so I thought Pilgrims was a good charity, and some of my friends have personal connections, too. I’m happy we’re doing this for Pilgrims.
Betty
Betty plays Pilgrims Hospices Lottery every week and there is also a collection tin in the building. Over the years, Betty and her fellow residents have raised over £2,000 in the tins alone, plus much more through lottery collections. Betty takes the tin to a coffee morning every Wednesday and people fill it up with spare change. Every little makes a big difference.
She added: “I enjoy having a chat with everyone as I collect, and also seeing Wendy from Pilgrims who comes to collect the money from me.
“It’s really nice, and as a group we have the pleasure of knowing that our money is going to a very worthy cause.”
Tell us your volunteer story on social media by using the hashtags #PilgrimsLife and #VolunteerVoices.
Volunteers’ Week is a chance to say thank you for the fantastic contribution millions of volunteers make across the UK. It takes place 1-7 June every year and is an opportunity to celebrate volunteering in all its diversity.
We’re accredited by REVAMP, a quality mark for Volunteer Involving Organisations developed by Stronger Kent Communities, a leading provider of support for the voluntary sector in Kent.
