Evelyn White attends Trees of Love in memory of her husband, Bob. Here, she explains why the festive remembrance service is so important for her family.
Robert and I met in 1994 at Whitehall where we both worked. We had both been married before, and between us we have three daughters, six grandchildren, and four great grandchildren.
He preferred to be called Bob. He was an intelligent man with a mathematical brain, a family man who had an affinity with animals and children. He wasn’t afraid to say what he felt and, in turn, he liked you to be honest with him. You could talk to him about anything and everything, particularly if something was upsetting you, if you didn’t understand or just wanted advice.
He was a hard worker and thought nothing of working seven days a week if money was needed for a holiday or to help the family.
Although the pain does not go away, it is really nice that there is always a place that we and other families can come together to celebrate the life of a loved one at Trees of Love, and dedicate a dove at Christmas. The support Pilgrims gives when we feel so low and don’t know what to do or where to turn is amazing, and it means a lot that we are not forgotten.
Evelyn
In 2014 Bob started getting ill and I took early retirement to look after him. We moved to a bungalow in Herne Bay and he got better. We all thought that everything was going to be ok, but in 2017 he took a turn for the worse. It was at that point we started to talk about his end of life.
My mum talked about her friend who volunteered every Monday at Pilgrims Hospice Thanet. I had never heard of this charity before. Little did we know that Bob would be transferred there. When he was in the hospice we didn’t know what to expect, we were so upset but the nurses were so good. We could talk to them, ask questions and nothing – and I mean nothing – was too much trouble. When Bob was alert the nurses would sit with us, talk, laugh and get him anything he asked for. On the 15 August 2017, myself and Bob’s daughter’s, Sarah and Lisa, stayed overnight at the hospice and in the morning of 16 August he passed away.
Two years have passed and we all miss him still. Although the pain does not go away, it is really nice that there is always a place that we and other families can come together to celebrate the life of a loved one at Trees of Love, and dedicate a dove at Christmas. The support Pilgrims gives when we feel so low and don’t know what to do or where to turn is amazing, and it means a lot that we are not forgotten.
This year, you can also post a message and a photo in memory of your loved one on our online Trees of Love memory wall.
If you or someone you know is coping with a life limiting illness and you think you may benefit from Pilgrims free services, talk to your GP or Healthcare Professional about your options or click here to read about our Wellbeing Programme.
26th November 2019
Pilgrims Pre-Loved Christmas Fair raises thousands for local hospice care
Hundreds flocked to Pilgrims Hospices Pre-Loved Christmas Fair at Westgate Hall in Canterbury on Saturday 23 November. It was a huge success for the second year running, raising more than £4,000 for hospice care across east Kent.
Visitors enjoyed a range of seasonal stalls, all run by Pilgrims staff and volunteers and stocked with items donated to Pilgrims shops. From games, toys and toiletries to a Christmas jumper sale and festive homeware, there was something for everyone. Homemade cakes, biscuits and sweet treats were also on offer.
We raised an incredible £4,222 for local hospice care. This exceeded our expectations and is 35% more money raised than at the same event last year. The footfall was amazing; we welcomed around 300 supporters on the day.
Mandy Hawkett, Retail Area Manager
Sally Keeling said: “Thank you to all the staff and volunteers for an amazing pre-loved event. Our second year of coming and we loved it.”
Santa and Mrs. Claus made a special guest appearance too, greeting excited children in Santa’s grotto. 4-year-old Lilly Naughton said: “It was the best Santa adventure ever!”
The day was another fantastic success for the Pilgrims Retail team who work across the charity’s 32 shops in east Kent. Mandy Hawkett, Retail Area Manager, said:
“It was a brilliant day with lovely feedback from supporters and our team of volunteers. We were supported by either staff or volunteers from every Pilgrims shop. The whole event was a real Retail team effort; from the warehouse manager dressed as a minion, to volunteers baking cakes and knitting, the Retail admin team wrapping presents and our Retail and Business Development Manager Tim serving tea and coffee.
“We raised an incredible £4,222 for local hospice care. This exceeded our expectations and is 35% more money raised than at the same event last year. The footfall was amazing; we welcomed around 300 supporters on the day. Charlotte Brown (Retail Manager East) organised another brilliant event for the second year running and has already started planning next year’s Pre-Loved Christmas Fair.”
Click here to find more about Pilgrims Hospices shops, including how you can donate items or give your time as a shop volunteer.
If you or someone you know is coping with a life limiting illness and you think you may benefit from Pilgrims free services, talk to your GP or Healthcare Professional about your options or click here to read about our Wellbeing Programme.
25th November 2019
Virtual Reality provides new possibilities for hospice patients
Ann Morris from Margate is almost 79 years old. She attends the Therapy Centre at Pilgrims Hospice Thanet, where she is benefitting from virtual reality (VR) technology recently introduced for hospice patients.
Ann was referred to the Wellbeing Programme at Pilgrims Hospices by Queen Elizabeth The Queen Mother Hospital (QEQM) after becoming unwell in December 2018. Having had fluid drawn from her lungs, further tests and a biopsy taken at Guy’s Hospital in London, she was diagnosed with lung cancer contracted from asbestos. Although Ann never worked with asbestos, her husband Ged worked within foundries and it is thought she could have been in contact with it through washing his clothing. Ged was cared for at Pilgrims Hospice Thanet three years ago; his condition was not asbestos-related.
Ann spoke affectionately of the care that her husband received at the hospice.
Ann with Kristy Wells, Occupational Therapist Assistant
Ann has been attending the Wellbeing Programme weekly since summer. She enjoys her time with the care team who offer support, friendship and therapy sessions, all of which are helping her to maintain health and mobility.
VR is a new addition to the Wellbeing Programme that patients like Ann are benefitting from. Ann said: “The Occupational Therapy team asked me what I’d like to do. I said ‘Go on an exotic holiday!’ and VR helped me to do this. It has made such a difference to me.”
Ann has had three VR experiences so far: an underwater adventure, a wildlife safari with David Attenborough and a visit to the African planes, where she was surrounded with beautiful African elephants and watched magnificent rhinos feeding. Each VR video is around seven minutes in length, giving the individual a close-up and personal experience.
This is a most relaxing experience; coming along to the Therapy Centre is helping me to cope with my condition. I really appreciate my time here.
Ann
Ann said: “This is a most relaxing experience; coming along to the Therapy Centre is helping me to cope with my condition. I really appreciate my time here. I attend once a week and enjoy the company of others.
“I also have a massage and some reiki.
“Lunch is always a treat and the crafting sessions give me an opportunity to do things that I could try at home. I’ve been making gift cards and decorations recently. I also thoroughly enjoy a team match of bocce in the afternoon before a cup of tea and a generous lift home from the Therapy Centre volunteer drivers.”
She continued: “I’m very lucky. I have two sons and one daughter all close by, and one daughter living up in the Midlands. I’m very proud to have 10 grandchildren and 13 great-grandchildren who regularly pop in to spend time with me and keep me active and positive.”
Kristy Wells, Occupational Therapist Assistant at Pilgrims Hospices, said: “VR technology is a wonderful way to help patients relax. We use it on the ward and in patients’ homes, it’s so flexible.”
If you or someone you know is coping with a life limiting illness and you think you may benefit from Pilgrims free services, talk to your GP or Healthcare Professional about your options or click here to read about our Wellbeing Programme.
22nd November 2019
Local athlete Yiannis Christodoulou pledges support for hospice care
Yiannis Christodoulou is European and National Aquathlon Champion 2019 and team captain representing Great Britain. Living in Canterbury and working in Ashford, Yiannis has always been aware of the important work of Pilgrims Hospices in his local community.
As a keen athlete, Yiannis enjoys taking part in events in his local area. In August 2019 he went to watch friends at the Canterbury Half Marathon, an annual event that has raised over £57,000 for the much-loved local hospices. Whilst there, Yiannis visited the Pilgrims information stand and picked up a 2019 event brochure. After looking through the variety of events they host, he felt inspired and contacted the charity expressing a desire to get involved supporting in any way that he could.
Yiannis was invited to meet with Cate Russell, Pilgrims Hospices Chief Executive, to discuss the role he could play for the charity.
He will soon be working with Pilgrims as a volunteer ambassador; his role will be to help Pilgrims open up conversations and support the community to think and plan for the future, bringing about societal change.
Since taking up running in 2012, Yiannis has never looked back; he’s always looking for new and exciting ways to get involved with local running events. When looking through the Pilgrims event brochure he saw Santas on the Run! Tri-Series, the perfect combination of festive celebrations, fun and a challenge; he had to get involved.
Pilgrims has been holding Santas on the Run! in Herne Bay for the past two years. The family-friendly festive fun run of 3k and 5k has been incredibly popular with the community with over £65,000 raised for local hospice care. This year, Pilgrims is excited to announce that Santas on the Run! will also be coming to Folkestone and Margate. The three festive fun runs will be taking place on consecutive weekends in December so that our Santas can challenge themselves to all three and join our tri-series in the countdown to Christmas. Yiannis is really looking forward to getting involved with the Santas on the Run! Tri-Series and will be taking part in Santas on the Bay! in Herne Bay on Sunday 1 December 2019.
Yiannis said: “This is a nice friendly run for fun, for a great cause. You never know where one run can take you.”
If you want to join Yiannis at Santas on the Run! and take part in the jolliest jog of the year, sign up now atwww.pilgrimshospices.org/santa.
Each year Pilgrims supports hundreds of local people coping with a life limiting illness and their families. The charity offers a range of services: from end of life care given on its wards, to its wellbeing programme supporting people after they are diagnosed to live well and stay independent.
Trees of Love: Mandy’s story
Mandy Broughton attends Trees of Love in memory of her husband, Eamon. Here, she shares how it helps her to feel close to him at an emotional time of year.
2019 has been my 20th wedding anniversary; it was such a happy day yet slightly tinged with apprehension. My husband Eamon had survived testicular and bowel cancer, but a routine check-up a few months prior to our wedding had shown some spots on his lungs.
We were married in Canterbury and went on honeymoon to Bermuda. Unfortunately, about three days into our honeymoon Eamon starting feeling unwell and we had to fly home early. What followed was several months of doctors and hospital appointments, waiting for a surgeon to return from his holiday, and a prolonged hospital stay at Kings in London.
As Eamon died so close to Christmas I find the Trees of Love services an ideal way of marking that time. Even though he died 20 years ago, I find it an emotional time. I like to take part in the services as I find it makes a little link with Eamon that I can’t achieve any other way.
Mandy
We were dealing with multiple doctors at multiple establishments and trying to ensure they all knew the full situation. If we had to call for a doctor, it took ages simply to explain what was wrong and what treatment he had. In addition to the underlying problems of his cancer, Eamon suffered from infections so he was taking a lot of medication.
At the end of August 1999 things came to a head. Eamon was either feeling terrible or knocked out by morphine. It was eventually arranged for him to go to the hospice in Canterbury. We all assumed it was the beginning of the end.
Mandy and Eamon
When we arrived Eamon was taken to a room and made comfortable. I was ushered into a nice office, given a cup of tea and shown such kindness and understanding that I broke down in tears. Two people gave me their full attention and time and I poured out the story of Eamon’s health. The relief of knowing that Eamon and I were going to be looked after was immense.
What I didn’t expect was to go into Eamon’s room later the same day and find him sitting up in bed, happy, chatting and choosing a drink from the afternoon drinks trolley! By simply sorting out his medication, the doctor at the hospice had transformed our lives.
So in a complete turnaround from my initial thoughts that the hospice was a sad place where Eamon would die, it became a place of new hope. Eamon stayed a few days and when he came home he was even able to ride a bike for a little while. We had a hospice nurse, Judy, visit once a week and she stayed on top of Eamon’s medication. In November 1999 Eamon’s health declined as he developed yet another primary cancer, this one in his brain. Judy’s visits were invaluable at this time.
Eamon died aged 42 in the Chaucer Hospital; my big regret being that he was too ill to be moved to the hospice. The six months after our wedding was a time of unbelievable heartache, worry, pain and sometimes panic. However, we did also experience incredible kindness, peace and even joy, and the hospice contributed greatly to those positives.
As Eamon died so close to Christmas I find the Trees of Love services an ideal way of marking that time. Even though he died 20 years ago, I find it an emotional time. I like to take part in the services as I find it makes a little link with Eamon that I can’t achieve any other way.
This year, you can also post a message and a photo in memory of your loved one on our online Trees of Love memory wall.
If you or someone you know is coping with a life limiting illness and you think you may benefit from Pilgrims free services, talk to your GP or Healthcare Professional about your options or click here to read about our Wellbeing Programme.
21st November 2019
Jingle Belles all the way for Pilgrims Hospices Christmas fundraising
Long-time friends Tash, Trudi, Shirilee, Kathy, Nikki, Jac and Sue will be taking part in the Santas on the Run! fun fundraiser in Herne Bay on Sunday 1 December this year. They are raising funds in memory of their dear friend Jacqi Woolf who was a strong supporter of the hospices and the Santas on the Run! event. Jacqi lost her fight against cancer in September 2019; the girls have named their running team ‘Jacqi’s Jingle Belles’.
The girls’ friendship grew when they met at Nikki’s yoga classes in Herons Leisure Centre in Herne Bay. The group quickly become good friends and would attend yoga workshops and retreats spending much time having fun and enjoying plenty of laughter.
Our close friend Jacqi was a dedicated supporter of Pilgrims Hospices.
Kathy Walsh
Kathy Walsh from Jacqi’s Jingle Belles told us: “We are taking part in Santas on the Run! on the Herne Bay seafront to raise much needed funds for Pilgrims Hospices this Christmas.
“Our close friend Jacqi was a dedicated supporter of Pilgrims Hospices taking part in numerous cycling, running and swimming challenges, including a Channel relay swim to raise funds for the charity.
“Jacqi took part in Santas on the Run! last year and pushed her dad in his wonderful Santa sleigh, much to the delight of those taking part and spectators.
“We were truly fortunate to call her our friend and her zest for life showed everyone how life should be lived; with 100% participation and enthusiasm to embrace new challenges.
“Always with a smile and preferably with cake (or chocolate)!”
Lydia Todd, Pilgrims Challenge Events Fundraiser said: “The girls have a truly heart-warming story and a desire to continue supporting our charity after Jacqi received care here at Pilgrims.
“We hope by sharing their story we can encourage even more supporters to register for this brilliant family fundraiser: www.pilgrimshospices.org/santas.
Being part of the fun will be making a difference to the care offered by our dedicated team of doctors and nurses in the hospices and within the community and people homes.”
If you would like to help the Belles raise cash for Pilgrims Hospices who made Jacqi’s last two weeks comfortable please donate to their JustGiving page: www.justgiving.com/team/jacqisjinglebelles.
If you or someone you know is coping with a life limiting illness and you think you may benefit from Pilgrims support, talk to your GP or Healthcare Professional about the options visit www.pilgrimshospices.org/wellbeing to read about Pilgrims Wellbeing Programme at the Pilgrims Therapy Centres.