As a member of Pilgrims Hospices Always Caring, Peggy Davis supports the charity with a monthly donation, after the care and support she and her sister, Val, received.
In December 2020, my sister, Val, was cared for at the Canterbury hospice for her final week. Near the end of her life, she was in quite a lot of pain, and a district nurse suggested that Pilgrims get involved to help.
I wanted to keep caring for her myself at home, but when I could no longer help with her pain, she went into the hospice.
In my pride, I thought that I was the only one who could really care for her. But when she went into the hospice, I was truly humbled to see the love and care that everyone there showed to Val. They really went the extra mile to look after her, and to make sure I was alright as well. You often hear how wonderful hospices can be, but until you get there and experience it you don’t know just how wonderful it is. It had such a happy atmosphere whenever I visited, which surprised me as I thought that it would be very quiet and sombre, but it was always very full of life.
I will never ever forget the love and kindness shown to Val, from the little things like massaging her feet, to the lovely chats, and the wonderful nursing.
Peggy
The first few days I visited each morning, but the last few days of Val’s life I was able to stay, and I never felt a pressure to leave. One evening I said to Val it was my time to go home, but she didn’t want me to, so the staff helped make me comfortable in an armchair, and allowed me to stay. They’d always said to me that if they thought Val would die in the night, they would let me know so I could come and we could spend her last hours together.
I will never ever forget the love and kindness shown to Val, from the little things like massaging her feet, to the lovely chats, and the wonderful nursing. Val didn’t sleep very well in that last week, and while they must have been very busy, the nurses would spend time sitting and talking with her about her life; she was a very private person, but they gave her that time.
I will always fully support Pilgrims as much as I can, and when I got Pilgrims Matters and saw that I could support the hospice with a monthly donation, it just felt like the natural thing for me to do.
I think it’s such a lovely thing to do, and a way for me to support the place that gave my sister such wonderful love and care at the end of her life.
None of us know when we might need hospice care, but with your support we can continue to be here for local people when they need us most.
By giving regularly to Pilgrims Hospices you can help us be here, Always Caring for our patients and their families.
Each year, Pilgrims Hospices give care and comfort to thousands of people in east Kent who are coming to terms with an illness that sadly cannot be cured. The charity support patients to live life as well as possible until the very end, free from pain and distress.
1st March 2022
Make a Will Month celebrates tenth year of supporting hospice care
In April and May 2022, seven solicitor firms across east Kent are generously giving their time and expertise to write or update Wills, in exchange for donations to Pilgrims Hospices.
This year marks the 10th anniversary of the hospice charity’s Make a Will Month scheme, normally held in February, which has raised over £170,000 for hospice care. For 2022, appointments will be available throughout April and May* for those who wish to make or amend Single or Mirror Wills.
We’ve heard first-hand just how invaluable the work of Pilgrims really is. Many clients choose to support them when drafting their Wills, so we are incredibly grateful for the opportunity to show our support too!
Zara King, Stilwell & Singleton
Ellie Cane, Individual Giving Officer, said:
“We’re delighted to say that we are building on the previous success of this appeal by welcoming two new solicitor firms for Make a Will Month 2022. Martin Tolhurst in Ashford, and Stilwell & Singleton in Deal, Dover and Sandwich have joined us to help more people in east Kent get their Will made.”
One of the many lessons the COVID-19 pandemic has taught is the importance of being prepared for the unexpected, and part of this is ensuring you have a Will in place so you have the reassurance of knowing your wishes will be fulfilled after you’ve gone.
Ellie added: “I’d like to take this opportunity to thank all the firms that have supported Pilgrims over the last ten years by partnering with us for Make a Will Month, and encourage everyone in east Kent to take this chance to make or update their Will whilst supporting their local hospice.”
Your Will is such an important document and there can be no doubt it is worth doing it properly. Making an appointment with one of our experts is a great way to donate to a crucial local charity and receive something of significant benefit to you and your family in return.
Simon Crooks, Boys & Maughan Solicitors
There are seven solicitor firms taking part in Make a Will Month 2022:
Suggested donations are £150 for a straightforward single Will, or £250 for an uncomplicated double Will. Those taking part are also welcome to donate more if they choose. An additional charge will be agreed with the chosen solicitor for a more complex Will.
*Participating month may differ from firm to firm; please check with firms directly.
For more information, including a full list of participating solicitors and their contact details, visit pilgrimshospices.org/makeawill.
Please contact your preferred firm directly to make an appointment.
Each year, Pilgrims Hospices give care and comfort to over 2,500 people in east Kent who are coming to terms with an illness that sadly cannot be cured. The charity support patients to live life as well as possible until the very end, free from pain and distress.
20th December 2021
Trees of Love raises £1 million for hospice care!
This year, Pilgrims Hospices welcomed over 1,200 people to their Trees of Love remembrance services, held throughout December 2021, at the hospices in Ashford, Canterbury and Thanet, and at indoor venues in New Romney, River, Cheriton, Charing and Barham.
Those remembering lost loved ones this Christmas dedicated doves to hang on the trees at each venue, or at home, to be illuminated throughout the festive season. All were then invited to join together to share their memories at the event or service of their choosing, where they enjoyed carol singing and warm mince pies.
This year also marks an incredible achievement for east Kent’s largest remembrance services, as Ellie Cane, Individual Giving Officer, explains:
“This very important remembrance service has been running for more than 20 years, and in that time we are pleased to say that we have just reached the milestone of raising over £1 million for the hospices! We’d like to thank all those who’ve supported this appeal over the years, and also to our incredible volunteers who help us make it happen each and every year.”
Pilgrims partnered once again this year with Firmager Funeral Directors, All Souls Church and School, St Peter and St Paul Church, and the Westerleigh Group to put on these very special events, allowing more people in east Kent who have lost loved ones to attend.
Ellie added: “The response to the appeal has been incredible, and we want to say a huge thank you to everyone that has dedicated a dove so far this year, and on previous years. Your support has meant we can continue to be still here, still caring even during difficult times.”
Pilgrims will continue to take donations for dedicated doves across the festive season. Contact their Supporter Relations Team on 01227 782 062 or visit pilgrimshospices.org/treesoflove to donate and dedicate a dove.
Each year Pilgrims Hospices give care and comfort to over 2,500 people in east Kent who are coming to terms with an illness that sadly cannot be cured. The charity support patients to live life as well as possible until the very end, free from pain and distress.
25th November 2021
Trees of Love: Ayo’s story
Ayo Adebiyi supports Trees of Love in memory of her mother, Patricia.
Here, she remembers her first experience of Trees of Love and shares why she’s looking forward to dedicating a dove again this year.
My mother, Patricia McGettigan Adebiyi, was a loving, bright and modest person. She never appreciated how amazing she was, and our family miss her so much.
In 2019, following a late cancer diagnosis, my mum spent her last five days in the Thanet hospice. After five weeks in hospital she was moved there so she could be more comfortable. I was able to stay with her for the whole five days, which I am so grateful for.
I first learned about the Trees of Love remembrance on the first day my mother spent in the hospice at Thanet. I remember looking out into the gardens, through the window of my mother’s room, and seeing all the people gathered for the service. I was incredibly moved by it, and it was an atmosphere I remembered when my invite came through the following year.
Ayo with her mother, Patricia
Trees of Love was very different in 2020, with a remembrance film to watch, and my mother’s dove sent home to me. I am so grateful that I was still able to celebrate my mother’s life, by hanging her dove on my tree at home, and sending in some photos to be part of the film, which I enjoyed very much.
I will be dedicating a dove to my mother again this year, and getting my first chance to return to the last place I was with my mum, and be part of the service I found so touching. My experience of the hospice when my mum stayed there was so good, and our family is very grateful for the care and support we had, so it will be really special to go back.
There will be no live service at our hospices this year. There will be a filmed service released on the Pilgrims Hospices YouTube channel at midday on Saturday 4 December, for you to enjoy before dropping in to find your dove.
We also offer indoor services with seating across our east Kent community:
Firmager, St Nicholas Church, New Romney, 3pm on Saturday 4 December 2021
All Souls Church, Cheriton, Folkestone, 5pm on Sunday 5 December 2021
St Peter and St Paul Church, River, Dover, 4pm on Sunday 12 December 2021
Barham Crematorium, Barham, 4.30pm on Tuesday 14 December 2021
Charing Crematorium, Charing, 4.30pm on Wednesday 15 December 2021
To dedicate a dove in memory of a loved one please visit pilgrimshospices.org/treesoflove or contact our Supporter Relations team:
You can also post a message and a photo in memory of your loved one on our online Trees of Love memory wall.
If you or someone you know is coping with a life limiting illness and you think you may benefit from Pilgrims free services, talk to your GP or Healthcare Professional about your options or click here to read about our Wellbeing Programme.
17th November 2021
Trees of Love: Sue’s story
Sue Duncan supports Trees of Love in memory of her sister, Jeannie, and their mother, Anne.
Here, she explains how Pilgrims Hospices helped the whole family and why she chooses to remember Jeannie and Anne in this way.
My sister, Jeannie, was referred to Pilgrims after a late stage lung cancer diagnosis, where she was given the best care and support through the Therapy Centres, in the hospice and at home.
Jeannie was a talented water colourist, and the arts sessions in the Therapy Centre really allowed her to continue exploring her creativity, and pursue her love of painting. She made good friends there, and it really helped take her mind off her illness.
As a carer to Jeannie, I received a great deal of support – at Pilgrims I was seen as a person too, who was watching her younger sister reach the end of her life. I’ve never forgotten the kindness I was treated with, in what was a very upsetting situation.
Shortly after Jeannie died, it became clear that our mother was really struggling with the loss her youngest daughter. She had felt helpless since Jeannie’s diagnosis, as her own disabilities meant she was unable to provide much practical help. Then when Jeannie died, she felt she should protect her family from the grief she didn’t know how to deal with. Pilgrims were wonderful, providing a counsellor with whom she could speak about Jeannie and her memories. It was a great help for my mother to have somebody who was kind and caring to connect with.
As a carer to Jeannie, I received a great deal of support – at Pilgrims I was seen as a person too, who was watching her younger sister reach the end of her life. I’ve never forgotten the kindness I was treated with, in what was a very upsetting situation.
Sue
Later in 2017, I was contacted by the hospice about the Trees of Love remembrance, and it just seemed a lovely thing to do. I told my mum I was doing it, and together we wrote a message on Jeannie’s dove. It was a way to symbolise our remembrance, and I’ve taken part every year since.
My mother died the following year, so now I remember them both with a dove. I thought the film in 2020 was a lovely thing to do, I watched it two or three times all the way through. Not only could I see my mum and sister remembered, but I also felt a togetherness with the other families remembering their loved ones. We were all going through the same thing.
I look forward to taking part again this year, and hopefully, coming to the service at the Canterbury hospice to experience that feeling of togetherness again, in person.
There will be no live service at our hospices this year. There will be a filmed service released on the Pilgrims Hospices YouTube channel at midday on Saturday 4 December, for you to enjoy before dropping in to find your dove.
We also offer indoor services with seating across our east Kent community:
Firmager, St Nicholas Church, New Romney, 3pm on Saturday 4 December 2021
All Souls Church, Cheriton, Folkestone, 5pm on Sunday 5 December 2021
St Peter and St Paul Church, River, Dover, 4pm on Sunday 12 December 2021
Barham Crematorium, Barham, 4.30pm on Tuesday 14 December 2021
Charing Crematorium, Charing, 4.30pm on Wednesday 15 December 2021
To dedicate a dove in memory of a loved one please visit pilgrimshospices.org/treesoflove or contact our Supporter Relations team:
You can also post a message and a photo in memory of your loved one on our online Trees of Love memory wall.
If you or someone you know is coping with a life limiting illness and you think you may benefit from Pilgrims free services, talk to your GP or Healthcare Professional about your options or click here to read about our Wellbeing Programme.
16th November 2021
Trees of Love: The Buckler family’s story
The Buckler family support Trees of Love in memory of David Buckler; a much-loved husband, son, father and grandad.
Here, they explain how Pilgrims Hospices helps them to come together with others, share memories and help local hospice services continue to be available for families in the future.
David Buckler was the rock of our family, he had a heart of gold and was a devoted husband to Jilly and an amazing son, dad and grandad. He has left a huge hole in our lives that can never be filled and we miss him dearly.
Dad had a love of motorsport and fast cars. He enjoyed a pint and a game of darts with his son and holidays in Rye with our mum.
In February 2019, Dad was given such devastating news that he had terminal pancreatic cancer; as the weeks went on, the cancer took hold.
Our dad was such a strong and proud man. He was brave and courageous to the end and the only tears he shed were concern for his family.
The day Dad went into Pilgrims Hospice Ashford is one we will never forget. Walking into the hospice, the way all the staff made us feel and the support and care they gave him and all of us was indescribable. Dad even asked how much this was costing, so that to us spoke volumes.
When Dad sadly passed away the next morning, all the staff there really showed empathy and compassion towards us and that meant the world to us during such a devastating time.
Trees of Love is so important to us as a family as the remembrance service gives us time to reflect and remember our dad at this time of year as he loved Christmas. It enables us to join together with other families in similar situations, and gives us the chance to support the hospice by way of a donation so they can give their love and vital, much needed support and devotion to other families the way they did for us.
There will be no live service at our hospices this year. There will be a filmed service released on the Pilgrims Hospices YouTube channel at midday on Saturday 4 December, for you to enjoy before dropping in to find your dove.
We also offer indoor services with seating across our east Kent community:
Firmager, St Nicholas Church, New Romney, 3pm on Saturday 4 December 2021
All Souls Church, Cheriton, Folkestone, 5pm on Sunday 5 December 2021
St Peter and St Paul Church, River, Dover, 4pm on Sunday 12 December 2021
Barham Crematorium, Barham, 4.30pm on Tuesday 14 December 2021
Charing Crematorium, Charing, 4.30pm on Wednesday 15 December 2021
To dedicate a dove in memory of a loved one please visit pilgrimshospices.org/treesoflove or contact our Supporter Relations team:
You can also post a message and a photo in memory of your loved one on our online Trees of Love memory wall.
If you or someone you know is coping with a life limiting illness and you think you may benefit from Pilgrims free services, talk to your GP or Healthcare Professional about your options or click here to read about our Wellbeing Programme.
