Christina Johnson supports Trees of Love in memory of her mum, Julie.
Here, she shares why she chooses to remember Julie in this way.
Our family – my mum and her husband, Terry, and two daughters, myself and Sarah – was originally from London, but later moved to Sandgate to be by the sea andthe countryside.
My mum was diagnosed with breast cancer for the second time, which then spread, and she sadly passed away in March 2016.
Pilgrims Hospice Ashford cared for my mum from November 2015 until March 2016. We had no idea what to expect, but we felt Mum had the best end-of-life care. Their service was exceptional, and it was reassuring knowing that she was being looked after so well. Mum always said she felt she was in a nice hotel! The staff were so kind and friendly, making Mum laugh, with time for conversation.
Trees of Love is such a special event for us, and we attend every year. Christmas time is hard and feels different now Mum is no longer with us. By joining other families at this event who have lost loved ones, we draw comfort, and enjoy the time to come together to remember our dear mum.
Christina
My mum always liked to look her best. The side effects of chemotherapy made her lose her confidence, but Pilgrims Hospices provided a volunteer beautician, who gave Mum a lovely pedicure in her room. The little extras they do for people are wonderful. She even enjoyed a little glass of red wine on some evenings!
Trees of Love is such a special event for us, and we attend every year. Christmas time is hard and feels different now Mum is no longer with us. By joining other families at this event who have lost loved ones, we draw comfort, and enjoy the time to come together to remember our dear mum. The hanging doves on the trees are a wonderful, personalised tribute to each individual family, for their lost loved ones. The beautiful lit-up gardens at Pilgrims Hospice Ashford, and the music and prayers, bring us both joy and comfort.
Pilgrims Hospices will always be a part of our lives. It helps us to feel connected to our mum and keep her memory alive.
Trees of Love events will take place at our hospices in Ashford, Canterbury and Thanet at 5pm on Saturday 3 December 2022.
You can also post a message and a photo in memory of your loved one on our online Trees of Love memory wall.
If you or someone you know is coping with a life-limiting illness and you think you may benefit from Pilgrims free services, talk to your GP or Healthcare Professional about your options or click here to read about our Wellbeing Programme.
12th October 2022
Trees of Love: Sally’s story
Sally Atkins supports Trees of Love in memory of her dad, Robin.
Here, she shares why remembering Robin at Trees of Love is an essential part of her year.
My dad, Robin, was a well-liked member of the community in Sandwich, where he spent most of his life. A postman and member of the local cricket club, he loved his family dearly and would always do what he could for them.
Sadly, he was diagnosed with prostate cancer, living with it bravely for a couple of years before it took hold aggressively. In June 2007, my wonderful dad lost his battle, with great dignity.
Sally’s dad, Robin
Dad was cared for at the Thanet hospice at the end of his life, with Mum and myself, always at his side. We cannot fault the care he received. Calm, peaceful and welcoming, the staff cared for us all with such kindness, allowing us to sleep by his bed, and make the most of every moment together.
Trees of Love is special to us as a family. After two years, I felt I wanted another way to remember my dad, moving forward with my grief. I found out about the Trees of Love service and came along to see what it was like. Now it’s very much part of my yearly calendar, and I’ve been attending for nearly nine years. Even after all this time, it still moves me, and I have a few tears during the service. The beautiful trees are all lit up, and I take photographs of the lights and Dad’s dove, to share with my family, especially ones who live far away.
Pilgrims is such a worthy cause and I will continue to support them and all they do for others. With events on all throughout the year, there’s something for everybody, and I look forward to attending Trees of Love this year, and remembering my special dad.
Trees of Love events will take place at our hospices in Ashford, Canterbury and Thanet at 5pm on Saturday 3 December 2022.
You can also post a message and a photo in memory of your loved one on our online Trees of Love memory wall.
If you or someone you know is coping with a life-limiting illness and you think you may benefit from Pilgrims free services, talk to your GP or Healthcare Professional about your options or click here to read about our Wellbeing Programme.
20th December 2021
Trees of Love raises £1 million for hospice care!
This year, Pilgrims Hospices welcomed over 1,200 people to their Trees of Love remembrance services, held throughout December 2021, at the hospices in Ashford, Canterbury and Thanet, and at indoor venues in New Romney, River, Cheriton, Charing and Barham.
Those remembering lost loved ones this Christmas dedicated doves to hang on the trees at each venue, or at home, to be illuminated throughout the festive season. All were then invited to join together to share their memories at the event or service of their choosing, where they enjoyed carol singing and warm mince pies.
This year also marks an incredible achievement for east Kent’s largest remembrance services, as Ellie Cane, Individual Giving Officer, explains:
“This very important remembrance service has been running for more than 20 years, and in that time we are pleased to say that we have just reached the milestone of raising over £1 million for the hospices! We’d like to thank all those who’ve supported this appeal over the years, and also to our incredible volunteers who help us make it happen each and every year.”
Pilgrims partnered once again this year with Firmager Funeral Directors, All Souls Church and School, St Peter and St Paul Church, and the Westerleigh Group to put on these very special events, allowing more people in east Kent who have lost loved ones to attend.
Ellie added: “The response to the appeal has been incredible, and we want to say a huge thank you to everyone that has dedicated a dove so far this year, and on previous years. Your support has meant we can continue to be still here, still caring even during difficult times.”
Pilgrims will continue to take donations for dedicated doves across the festive season. Contact their Supporter Relations Team on 01227 782 062 or visit pilgrimshospices.org/treesoflove to donate and dedicate a dove.
Each year Pilgrims Hospices give care and comfort to over 2,500 people in east Kent who are coming to terms with an illness that sadly cannot be cured. The charity support patients to live life as well as possible until the very end, free from pain and distress.
25th November 2021
Trees of Love: Ayo’s story
Ayo Adebiyi supports Trees of Love in memory of her mother, Patricia.
Here, she remembers her first experience of Trees of Love and shares why she’s looking forward to dedicating a dove again this year.
My mother, Patricia McGettigan Adebiyi, was a loving, bright and modest person. She never appreciated how amazing she was, and our family miss her so much.
In 2019, following a late cancer diagnosis, my mum spent her last five days in the Thanet hospice. After five weeks in hospital she was moved there so she could be more comfortable. I was able to stay with her for the whole five days, which I am so grateful for.
I first learned about the Trees of Love remembrance on the first day my mother spent in the hospice at Thanet. I remember looking out into the gardens, through the window of my mother’s room, and seeing all the people gathered for the service. I was incredibly moved by it, and it was an atmosphere I remembered when my invite came through the following year.
Ayo with her mother, Patricia
Trees of Love was very different in 2020, with a remembrance film to watch, and my mother’s dove sent home to me. I am so grateful that I was still able to celebrate my mother’s life, by hanging her dove on my tree at home, and sending in some photos to be part of the film, which I enjoyed very much.
I will be dedicating a dove to my mother again this year, and getting my first chance to return to the last place I was with my mum, and be part of the service I found so touching. My experience of the hospice when my mum stayed there was so good, and our family is very grateful for the care and support we had, so it will be really special to go back.
There will be no live service at our hospices this year. There will be a filmed service released on the Pilgrims Hospices YouTube channel at midday on Saturday 4 December, for you to enjoy before dropping in to find your dove.
We also offer indoor services with seating across our east Kent community:
Firmager, St Nicholas Church, New Romney, 3pm on Saturday 4 December 2021
All Souls Church, Cheriton, Folkestone, 5pm on Sunday 5 December 2021
St Peter and St Paul Church, River, Dover, 4pm on Sunday 12 December 2021
Barham Crematorium, Barham, 4.30pm on Tuesday 14 December 2021
Charing Crematorium, Charing, 4.30pm on Wednesday 15 December 2021
To dedicate a dove in memory of a loved one please visit pilgrimshospices.org/treesoflove or contact our Supporter Relations team:
You can also post a message and a photo in memory of your loved one on our online Trees of Love memory wall.
If you or someone you know is coping with a life limiting illness and you think you may benefit from Pilgrims free services, talk to your GP or Healthcare Professional about your options or click here to read about our Wellbeing Programme.
17th November 2021
Trees of Love: Sue’s story
Sue Duncan supports Trees of Love in memory of her sister, Jeannie, and their mother, Anne.
Here, she explains how Pilgrims Hospices helped the whole family and why she chooses to remember Jeannie and Anne in this way.
My sister, Jeannie, was referred to Pilgrims after a late stage lung cancer diagnosis, where she was given the best care and support through the Therapy Centres, in the hospice and at home.
Jeannie was a talented water colourist, and the arts sessions in the Therapy Centre really allowed her to continue exploring her creativity, and pursue her love of painting. She made good friends there, and it really helped take her mind off her illness.
As a carer to Jeannie, I received a great deal of support – at Pilgrims I was seen as a person too, who was watching her younger sister reach the end of her life. I’ve never forgotten the kindness I was treated with, in what was a very upsetting situation.
Shortly after Jeannie died, it became clear that our mother was really struggling with the loss her youngest daughter. She had felt helpless since Jeannie’s diagnosis, as her own disabilities meant she was unable to provide much practical help. Then when Jeannie died, she felt she should protect her family from the grief she didn’t know how to deal with. Pilgrims were wonderful, providing a counsellor with whom she could speak about Jeannie and her memories. It was a great help for my mother to have somebody who was kind and caring to connect with.
As a carer to Jeannie, I received a great deal of support – at Pilgrims I was seen as a person too, who was watching her younger sister reach the end of her life. I’ve never forgotten the kindness I was treated with, in what was a very upsetting situation.
Sue
Later in 2017, I was contacted by the hospice about the Trees of Love remembrance, and it just seemed a lovely thing to do. I told my mum I was doing it, and together we wrote a message on Jeannie’s dove. It was a way to symbolise our remembrance, and I’ve taken part every year since.
My mother died the following year, so now I remember them both with a dove. I thought the film in 2020 was a lovely thing to do, I watched it two or three times all the way through. Not only could I see my mum and sister remembered, but I also felt a togetherness with the other families remembering their loved ones. We were all going through the same thing.
I look forward to taking part again this year, and hopefully, coming to the service at the Canterbury hospice to experience that feeling of togetherness again, in person.
There will be no live service at our hospices this year. There will be a filmed service released on the Pilgrims Hospices YouTube channel at midday on Saturday 4 December, for you to enjoy before dropping in to find your dove.
We also offer indoor services with seating across our east Kent community:
Firmager, St Nicholas Church, New Romney, 3pm on Saturday 4 December 2021
All Souls Church, Cheriton, Folkestone, 5pm on Sunday 5 December 2021
St Peter and St Paul Church, River, Dover, 4pm on Sunday 12 December 2021
Barham Crematorium, Barham, 4.30pm on Tuesday 14 December 2021
Charing Crematorium, Charing, 4.30pm on Wednesday 15 December 2021
To dedicate a dove in memory of a loved one please visit pilgrimshospices.org/treesoflove or contact our Supporter Relations team:
You can also post a message and a photo in memory of your loved one on our online Trees of Love memory wall.
If you or someone you know is coping with a life limiting illness and you think you may benefit from Pilgrims free services, talk to your GP or Healthcare Professional about your options or click here to read about our Wellbeing Programme.
16th November 2021
Trees of Love: The Buckler family’s story
The Buckler family support Trees of Love in memory of David Buckler; a much-loved husband, son, father and grandad.
Here, they explain how Pilgrims Hospices helps them to come together with others, share memories and help local hospice services continue to be available for families in the future.
David Buckler was the rock of our family, he had a heart of gold and was a devoted husband to Jilly and an amazing son, dad and grandad. He has left a huge hole in our lives that can never be filled and we miss him dearly.
Dad had a love of motorsport and fast cars. He enjoyed a pint and a game of darts with his son and holidays in Rye with our mum.
In February 2019, Dad was given such devastating news that he had terminal pancreatic cancer; as the weeks went on, the cancer took hold.
Our dad was such a strong and proud man. He was brave and courageous to the end and the only tears he shed were concern for his family.
The day Dad went into Pilgrims Hospice Ashford is one we will never forget. Walking into the hospice, the way all the staff made us feel and the support and care they gave him and all of us was indescribable. Dad even asked how much this was costing, so that to us spoke volumes.
When Dad sadly passed away the next morning, all the staff there really showed empathy and compassion towards us and that meant the world to us during such a devastating time.
Trees of Love is so important to us as a family as the remembrance service gives us time to reflect and remember our dad at this time of year as he loved Christmas. It enables us to join together with other families in similar situations, and gives us the chance to support the hospice by way of a donation so they can give their love and vital, much needed support and devotion to other families the way they did for us.
There will be no live service at our hospices this year. There will be a filmed service released on the Pilgrims Hospices YouTube channel at midday on Saturday 4 December, for you to enjoy before dropping in to find your dove.
We also offer indoor services with seating across our east Kent community:
Firmager, St Nicholas Church, New Romney, 3pm on Saturday 4 December 2021
All Souls Church, Cheriton, Folkestone, 5pm on Sunday 5 December 2021
St Peter and St Paul Church, River, Dover, 4pm on Sunday 12 December 2021
Barham Crematorium, Barham, 4.30pm on Tuesday 14 December 2021
Charing Crematorium, Charing, 4.30pm on Wednesday 15 December 2021
To dedicate a dove in memory of a loved one please visit pilgrimshospices.org/treesoflove or contact our Supporter Relations team:
You can also post a message and a photo in memory of your loved one on our online Trees of Love memory wall.
If you or someone you know is coping with a life limiting illness and you think you may benefit from Pilgrims free services, talk to your GP or Healthcare Professional about your options or click here to read about our Wellbeing Programme.
