Kate’s fantastic festive fundraising in memory of dad Dennis
Kate Johnson from Herne Bay supports Pilgrims Hospices to give back to the charity that cared for her dad, Dennis Beer, at the end of his life.
On Sunday 28 November 2021, Kate joined hundreds of fellow festive fundraisers at Santas on the Bay! to remember her much-loved dad and help to ensure that other families can benefit from Pilgrims’ vital and compassionate care.
Dennis and Gill Beer with Kate’s daughter, Millie, on the toy box that Dennis made for her
‘He was valued as a person and that image will stay with me a lifetime.’
Dennis was an antique furniture restorer from Teynham; he died peacefully at home, aged 71, on 20 January 2017.
Kate said: “Dad fought a long and courageous battle against bowel cancer, exhausting all surgeries available to him and enduring multiple rounds of gruelling chemotherapy. At this point, the doctors explained that his liver wasn’t able to cope with any more treatment and that it was time to stop. It’s difficult to know how to just stop trying to get better; how do you physically and emotionally support somebody to die? It’s definitely not something I felt confident doing – I was used to my dad looking after me, not the other way around.
“Dad was a real home bod. When he was told that he was dying, he chose to receive support from Pilgrims’ Hospice at Home team. I moved back home in the final ten days leading up to his death, so that I could support my mum as she cared for Dad, but mostly so that I didn’t miss any time with him.
Dennis and Kate
“I’m so grateful that Dad was able to stay in the home that he loved, surrounded by the people he loved, at the hardest time our family has ever faced. My mum ran an intensive care unit before she retired and has vast and comprehensive medical knowledge, but says there is a huge difference between caring for patients when you’re behind a uniform and supporting the man you love as he dies. Watching Dad deteriorate knocked Mum’s confidence in her ability to care for him; the hospice staff helped to build her back up again, holding her hand and ‘having her back’ so that she felt strong enough to care for Dad.
“As a daughter, it’s very strange watching your dad die. We’d always been close; he was my hero. He was big, strong, loved us fiercely and protected us. Suddenly, he was tired, in pain, desperately sad at the thought of leaving us and needed us to look after him. It’s very hard to do that when the pain of what’s ahead feels like it’s crushing you.
“The Hospice at Home team were incredible. They seemed to know exactly when we needed them, and would always arrive with a big smile, often a warm hug and always lots of reassuring words. They treated Dad with respect and dignity – speaking to him about what he wanted, making sure that he was in the driving seat and that he had choices rather than just doing things to him. They’d laugh and joke, and in those final days they became part of our family. Dad would always thank them profusely for their time and generosity and appreciated every minute of them helping to care for him.
Dennis
“On the evening of 20th January 2017, the nurses arrived to see how we were all getting on. By this time, Dad was on a syringe driver and unable to communicate with us. The nurses popped the kettle on and we talked about how Dad was doing before heading into the ‘sunroom’ to sit with him. As I walked into the room, I knew his breathing was different and that something was happening. The nurses told Mum and I that Dad was dying and helped us move the bed away from the wall so that we could be either side of him, holding his hand, stroking his face and telling him we loved him as he slipped away. They stayed in the room with us until Dad had gone and comforted us whilst the magnitude of what had happened sunk in.
“Shortly after, the nurses asked us if we’d like them to dress Dad in some of his favourite clothes. We left the room for a short while and when we came back, they had dressed him in a beautiful checked shirt, sprayed his deodorant on his clothes, laid him down so he looked peaceful and snipped a sprig of flowers from a nearby plant, which they laid on his pillow, next to his head. I’ve never been so touched and overwhelmed in my life – he looked and smelt like my dad should. Even after his death, the hospice team treated him with the utmost respect and care; he was valued as a person and that image will stay with me a lifetime.”
Pilgrims helps to make life more ‘normal’
Kate’s grandmother, Elisabeth Beer, was also cared for in the Canterbury hospice in 2003. She remembers visiting her at Christmas that year:
“When we turned up, she wasn’t in her room but was instead in the chapel singing Christmas carols. We could hear her singing from outside the door. She would have been so grateful to have been able to visit church at Christmas and share a service with others; Pilgrims helped to make life just that little bit more normal for her.”
Kate’s festive fundraising journey
Kate with her mum, Gill, and her children, Millie and Harry
Kate always planned to take part in a Pilgrims’ fundraising event but knew it would mean getting fit. She said: “I’m currently in the process of joining Kent Police; as part of the interview process, I have to meet certain fitness criteria so I’ve started running.
“When I saw Santas on the Bay! pop up in my email, I sent a copy to my boyfriend joking that I’d do it because it was an excellent opportunity to raise money for Pilgrims – plus it would give me motivation to keep my fitness levels up. Next thing I know, I get an email thanking me for my entry and here I am!”
Kate is supported in her fundraising by her mum, Gill, her children, Millie (7) and Harry (3), her boyfriend, Anthony, who runs with her every week, and her friends. Her dad remains a constant source of motivation, too:
“I wouldn’t have wanted to let him down by backing out of this! My mum says how proud he’d be of me.”
On the day itself, Kate and Anthony joined hundreds of fellow Santas who braved arctic conditions along Herne Bay seafront.
Kate and Anthony at Santas on the Bay! 2021
Kate added: “It was such a lovely event and so touching to see so many people braving the freezing cold to raise money for such a worthy cause. I’ll definitely be signing up again!”
Dennis with Kate’s daughter, Millie
She continued: “The pain of losing somebody you love is unbearable. When that person needs you to help them die, how do you do that? Pilgrims helped us to help my dad pass comfortably, peacefully and with respect. It’s so important to me that other families are offered the services and support that were so vital to us during that time.
“I want to raise awareness of such an amazing cause, encourage others to sign up for similar events, have fun and learn about other people’s stories and the people who mean so much to them. Most importantly, I want to raise money so that others can experience the care my dad received.
“Finally, it’s just a lovely way to remind everyone that Dennis Beer was very much here. A big, talented man with rough hands from working hard. A principled, funny, problem solver who had a story for every occasion. He was the best dad I could have ever had, and I will always be so proud to be his daughter.
“He was a real person, he was loved so, so dearly and he will never be forgotten by us. It’s so nice to be able to speak about him and say his name.”
Each year Pilgrims Hospices give care and comfort to over 2,500 people in east Kent who are coming to terms with an illness that sadly cannot be cured. The charity support patients to live life as well as possible until the very end, free from pain and distress.
10th November 2021
Trees of Love returns to light up east Kent
This year, local charity Pilgrims Hospices sees the return of the Trees of Love remembrance events at its three hospices and at alternative venues across east Kent.
The largest festive remembrance to take place in east Kent has been running for over 20 years, and raised over £970,000 for the charity to date.
Ellie Cane, who is part of the team behind Trees of Love, said:
“We are so amazed at the amount our local community has raised by taking part in Trees of Love for all these years, and this year we’re really hoping that with their help we can reach £1 million. This would be such an incredible achievement, and I would like to take this chance to say a huge thank you in advance to all those who will be joining us for the remembrance this December.”
The remembrance will begin with the release of a filmed service on the Pilgrims Hospices’ YouTube channel and website on Saturday 4 December at 12pm. This replaces the usual live service performed at the three hospices in Ashford, Canterbury and Thanet. Guests are then invited to drop in to the hospices between 4pm and 6pm on the same day to find their dedicated dove, whilst enjoying carol singing and warm mince pies.
Ellie continued:
“On behalf of everyone at Pilgrims, I would like to encourage anyone who has lost someone to join with us to remember by dedicating a beautiful dove in memory of their loved ones. To take part, contact our Supporter Relations team, and we will send a dove out to you to decorate with your personal message. We will place your beautiful dove on the trees at your chosen site, to remain illuminated throughout the festive season.”
Pilgrims Hospices’ Trees of Love remembrances will be held in the gardens of each hospice at Ashford, Canterbury and Thanet on Saturday 4 December 2021, between 4pm and 6pm. Pilgrims also host alternative services at other venues in Barham, Charing, Cheriton, Dover and New Romney.
If you would like to take part to join with others to remember your loved ones and mark this special occasion, or for more information, contact Pilgrims’ Supporter Relations team on 01227 782 062 or email [email protected].
Each year Pilgrims Hospices give care and comfort to over 2,500 people in east Kent who are coming to terms with an illness that sadly cannot be cured. The charity support patients to live life as well as possible until the very end, free from pain and distress.
Supporters hot-foot it for Pilgrims Hospices this bonfire season!
Pilgrims Hospices sponsored Firewalk series returned for its sixth year over the bonfire season and saw almost 90 brave supporters face their fears to conquer the coals. The annual event challenges people to walk barefoot over red-hot wood embers measuring 800 degrees and raise much-needed funds for Pilgrims’ specialist, end-of-life care!
The daring dash took place in three locations across east Kent – in Ashford on 29 October, Canterbury on 30 October and Broadstairs on 6 November – and is expected to raise more than £12,000 for the local hospice charity with more sponsorship to follow.
A total of 932 Pilgrims supporters have taken on the ‘hottest, shortest sponsored walk in the world’ since 2016 to raise a staggering £210,358 for those living with an incurable illness in our community.
Robert Grew, Pilgrims Events Manager, said: “It was fantastic to see so many supporters, quite literally, stepping out of their comfort zone to brave the barefoot firewalk for Pilgrims Hospices. A huge thank you to everyone who joined us and faced their fear to raise vital funds for the care of patients in our local community. You’ve followed in the toasted footsteps of more than 900 Pilgrims supporters before you and certainly earned your place in the Hall of Flame!”
Motivational speaker and firewalk specialist Cliff Mann, held a training seminar for participants before they stepped out to face the flames.
Cliff said: “Firewalking is a huge personal challenge, I’ve been teaching people the skills for more than 30 years now. It’s great to be back and empowering Pilgrims supporters to take on the hottest, shortest sponsored walk in the world. It’s always a great pleasure to help charities raise vital funds while helping people to achieve something truly life changing.”
Chris Laming Westbrook (Margate) 1
Robert added: “We’d like to thank our services team at the Ashford hospice for making it possible to hold our event in the hospice grounds; the University of Kent Sport for hosting us in Canterbury, and our latest venue for Firewalk, Thanet Wanderers Rugby Club at Broadstairs, for making us welcome and giving everyone a very special night to remember.
“Sponsorship money will continue to come in for some time yet, we will be able to announce a final figure around the festive season.”
There are some great challenges and events on Pilgrims Hospices website: pilgrimshospices.org/events. Why not take a look and help Pilgrims Hospices reach even more people who need our specialist care?
Care is provided from three hospice sites in Ashford, Canterbury and Thanet as well as in patients’ own homes. To offer these services to patients and their families the charity must raise £11 million each year from the generous local community.
12th October 2021
Hospice nurse retires after almost 50 years of caring service
Sue Clark from Canterbury has enjoyed a long career in nursing; starting out as a children’s nurse, she then moved to caring for elderly patients. Finally, Sue spent the last 15 years of her career at Pilgrims Hospices, supporting adults approaching the end of life.
Now, aged 65, she is looking forward to retirement with a sense of gratitude and appreciation that has come from working with hospice patients.
Originally from Bracknell, Berkshire, at 16 years old Sue became a nursing cadet. She trained in orthopaedic and general nursing at Queen Mary’s Hospital for Children, qualifying in 1978.
Sue moved to east Kent with her best friend from nursing school, whose father managed the local cottage hospitals and got Sue a job at Herne Hospital. She also worked at Nunnery Fields Hospital in Canterbury, and further afield in south-east London, before moving to Kent and Canterbury Hospital in the 1990s.
She said: “I initially wanted to be an air stewardess! But I really loved caring for people and became interested in children’s nursing. It’s funny – I started out working with children and ended up at the other side of life.”
At Pilgrims, we care for the patient and the whole family. It’s not like in hospital; we can get involved, we have the time to get to know families.
Sue
In between, Sue did some community nursing work with Marie Curie, supporting patients with terminal illnesses. This was her first experience of working in palliative care, and in 2006 she joined Pilgrims as a Registered General Nurse (RGN).
In 2019, she gave up her registration and spent her last two years of service working as a Healthcare Assistant (HCA).
Sue continued: “At Pilgrims, we care for the patient and the whole family. It’s not like in hospital; we can get involved, we have the time to get to know families. We’re also able to provide aftercare for loved ones, too.
“I love being hands on with basic nursing care, and the HCA role enabled me to do even more of this so I really enjoyed it.”
Working at Pilgrims, you realise that life is so short. I just want to enjoy retirement with my husband and make the most of every moment.
Sue
Kate White, Head of Nursing at Pilgrims, said: “To dedicate 50 years to nursing is a huge achievement and shows strength of character. I cannot imagine how many patients and their families have been cared for by Sue in all this time!
“We wish her all the very best for a well-deserved retirement and thank her for her commitment to Pilgrims.”
Now that she has retired, Sue is looking forward to catching up with friends, spending time with family and planning a few mini-breaks.
She added: “Working at Pilgrims, you realise that life is so short. I just want to enjoy retirement with my husband and make the most of every moment.”
Each year Pilgrims Hospices give care and comfort to over 2,500 people in east Kent coming to terms with an illness that sadly cannot be cured. The charity supports patients to live life as well as possible until the very end, free from pain and distress. Care is provided from three hospice sites in Thanet, Canterbury and Ashford as well as in patients’ own homes. To offer these services to patients and their families the charity must raise £11 million each year from the generous local community.
18th August 2021
Pilgrims Garden Festival brought summer fun for all the family
On Sunday 15 August 2021, Pilgrims Hospices hosted a brand-new event within the stunning grounds of Mount Ephraim, Faversham.
The Pilgrims Garden Festival brought local food and drink producers, plant sellers and crafters together in the market area celebrating local businesses from across east Kent.
With something for everyone, people of all ages came along to shop and discover everything from plants, flowers and local wines to hand-made jewellery and textile plant pots! When the shopping was finished, visitors enjoyed a game or two on the coconut shy or tombola before relaxing in the tea party with a cream tea or slice of cake.
Visitors were left inspired after watching The Nightingale Garden demo on how to create a beautiful hand-tied bouquet, followed by a wine tasting hosted by Clive from Corkk – the English wine specialists.
Canterbury Community Fundraising Manager Leila Ilkhan said: “We are delighted that our first ever Pilgrims Garden Festival was enjoyed so much by visitors, volunteers and local businesses. After so long not being able to hold events, it was great to welcome the community to come together to support their local hospice.”
The day finished with a magic show for all the family hosted by Stuart Weller Magic that left visitors marvelling over his tricks.
A big thank you to our headline sponsors Canterbury Suzuki and to all the other local businesses and volunteers who helped make this event such a huge success, raising nearly £9,500 in vital funds for Pilgrims Hospices.
Each year Pilgrims Hospices give care and comfort to over 2,500 people in east Kent who are coming to terms with an illness that sadly cannot be cured. The charity support patients to live life as well as possible until the very end, free from pain and distress.
16th July 2020
Mad Hair Day for Hospice Care!
The Year six students at Stelling Minnis Primary School are celebrating their last day of term by creating some crazy hairstyles to raise vital funds for Pilgrims Hospices.
The school year is usually filled with everyone getting involved with fundraising activities to support the local community which due to Covid – 19 have disappointedly been halted. However Year 6 have decided to still do their bit and organise a fundraiser to mark the end of their time at primary school.
Year 6 student, Clara said: “Due to the current pandemic we have been unable to do our usual enterpirses to raise money for charity. We are going to make our last days at primary school count by holding a mad hair day for Pilgrims Hospices.”
Class teacher, Mrs Newsome said: “I am so proud of the thoughtful way the students discussed and voted for a charity. Not only that they have come up with some compelling advertising to encourage donations to Pilgrims Hospices.”
The students have already exceeded their fundraising target of £75 and raised over £500 so far in vital funds for Pilgrims. Their support will make a huge difference, helping Pilgrims to continue delivering specialist care to patients living with a terminal illness and their families throughout east Kent.
I am so proud of the thoughtful way the students discussed and voted for a charity.
Mrs Newsome – Class teacher
If you would like to show your support for the class of 2020 you can make a donation to their Just Giving page here
Each year Pilgrims supports hundreds of local people coping with a life-limiting illness and their families. The charity offers a range of services: from end-of-life care given on its wards, to its Wellbeing Programme supporting people after they are diagnosed to live well and stay independent.
