Each year, Pilgrims Hospices support thousands of people across east Kent who are living with life-limiting conditions.
Although hospice care is often associated with beds on in-patient wards, much of Pilgrims’ care takes place in the community – in people’s own homes, and in care homes.
Thanks to skilled, compassionate and dedicated community teams, Pilgrims is able to bring hospice care directly to patients who wish to remain at home, or in familiar surroundings, rather than be on a ward. This includes Hospice at Home, a team of Healthcare Assistants (HCAs) who attend to patients who are at the very end of their life and/or who have suddenly, rapidly deteriorated.
Jo Cottam, a retired NHS Senior Manager turned holiday let owner from Tenterden, experienced Pilgrims’ community care after her mum, Patricia Edwards, was diagnosed with vascular dementia. She shares how Pilgrims supported her mum and their family at the end of Patricia’s life.
Jo shares her story:
“In 2019, my mother was diagnosed with vascular dementia. She lived in a charming cottage on our property, spending her days with us in the main house and returning to her cottage at night.
In early July 2025, Mum’s health took a concerning turn. She stopped eating for about a week, drank less than we hoped, and lost her mobility, making walking (especially navigating steps between our house and her cottage) extremely difficult and distressing for her. My husband, Simon, and her carer, Steve, provided essential support, but we grew increasingly worried.
We decided to keep Mum in her cottage full-time, as moving her was too challenging. This meant constant supervision, as she couldn’t be left alone. Encouraging her to take fluids was a slow, painstaking process of syringing small amounts into her mouth. On 10 July, we called our GP, who visited promptly. He prescribed antibiotics for a possible UTI, end-of-life medications, and arranged a referral to Pilgrims’ Hospice at Home team.
Jo’s mum, Patricia
After a three-day course of antibiotics, Mum began to improve, slowly resuming eating and drinking.
Soon after, I received a call offering additional care support, which we desperately needed. Mum required physical assistance to move between her bed and sofa, constant prompting to eat and drink, and round-the-clock supervision.
Unfortunately, the caller later informed us that no additional care could be arranged immediately, though an equipment assessment was scheduled for the next day.
To our surprise and relief, that evening, two wonderful Hospice at Home carers, Jo and Sandra, arrived and said they would visit Mum twice daily. I was initially apprehensive, as Mum was used to familiar faces, but Jo and Sandra’s warmth and gentle introductions put her at ease. Mum smiled and co-operated fully, a testament to their kind and professional approach.
Over the next few weeks, every pair of hospice carers who visited showed the same compassion, treating Mum with dignity and respect.
They also supported our family, offering practical advice and emotional reassurance in overwhelming moments.
As a former Senior NHS Manager with over 25 years of experience, and with my husband, a retired Consultant Anaesthetist, we both recognise exceptional care when we see it. The hospice carers delivered first-class service.
We were astonished to learn they travelled significant distances to reach us in Tenterden, covering a vast geographical area. The team, led by the remarkable Mandy Hilden, exemplified dedication. Mandy’s hands-on leadership was inspiring – she never asked her team to do anything she wouldn’t do herself.
The carers went above and beyond, ensuring Mum was clean, dressed in her preferred clothes, and had her hair washed and styled. They made her laugh and calmed her anxieties, especially when she became distressed during repositioning, gently reassuring her even when she grabbed them in fear.
The rapport we built with the hospice carers in such a short time was extraordinary.
On 24 July 2025, Caitlin, a Palliative Specialist Care Nurse from Pilgrims, visited to assess Mum for potential future hospice care. Caitlin’s professional yet friendly demeanour brought smiles to Mum’s face. She patiently explained everything and answered our questions thoroughly. At the time, Caitlin was optimistic about Mum’s condition, believing hospice care wouldn’t be needed soon.
Tragically, on 29 July 2025, Mum passed away suddenly and peacefully at home, with us by her side, holding her hand. Caitlin, upon hearing the news, called to offer her condolences and support. Her kindness, taking the time to listen and guide me toward the hospice’s counselling services, meant the world during such a shocking and painful moment.
Pilgrims is an exceptional organisation, dedicated to supporting individuals with terminal illnesses, offering compassionate care in both community settings and specialised units. They prioritise the needs and dignity of each person, ensuring the highest quality of care during their final days.
Additionally, Pilgrims provides a nurturing environment for families, fostering support and understanding throughout the process.
The hospice team’s communication, care, and support for both Mum and our family were exceptional. We are immensely grateful for this vital service, which relies so heavily on charitable donations. Their compassion and professionalism made an unbearable time more bearable, and we cannot thank them enough.”
Pilgrims Hospices provides compassionate, specialist care free of charge to thousands of people in east Kent each year who are living with life-limiting conditions. Support is offered in patients’ homes, in the community, and at our three hospice sites in Canterbury, Thanet and Ashford. We also run a 24-hour advice line.
8th October 2025
Caring in the community: Stephen and Heather’s Hospice at Home story
When Stephen Coles looks back on the care his wife, Heather, received in her final months, he speaks with deep gratitude for the compassion and tenderness shown by the Pilgrims Hospices Hospice at Home team.
Heather, aged 64, had been living with Parkinson’s and Lewy Body Dementia. She died peacefully at home on 29 July 2025, with her husband by her side.
Heather
Heather had enjoyed a long and dedicated career at Benenden Hospital, where she worked for more than 25 years, most recently as Director of Infection Control, before retiring early due to ill health.
Stephen, who also worked at Benenden, cared for Heather at home in Ashford throughout her last year of life. As Heather became more frail and her needs increased, they were supported first by the Pilgrims community team, and later by the Pilgrims Hospice at Home carers.
Stephen and Heather met online in 2011, and their love story began soon after. They shared their first date at The Tickled Trout in Wye and, as Stephen fondly recalls, they both ordered the same meal of liver and bacon.
“I knew straight away she was the one for me,” he said.
As Heather’s condition progressed, their home was adapted to make caring for her easier, with a hospital bed moved into the downstairs room. Stephen stayed close by her side, sleeping nearby to offer reassurance and comfort.
Stephen and Hannah
Heather’s daughter, Hannah, was also a great support to both her mum and stepdad.
When the Hospice at Home team began visiting, Stephen immediately felt the difference their presence made:
“They didn’t just wash and care for Heather,” he explained. “They did so much more than I expected – washing her hair, tending to her so gently and with such kindness. I found their support really helpful for me, too. The level of care and commitment they showed was exceptional.”
The Hospice at Home team specialises in supporting patients and families at the very end of life, providing comfort, dignity, and peace at home.
Mandy Hilden, Team Lead, said:
“We know this is such a difficult time for those we visit, so we make sure we arrive with the right mindset to help both our patient and their family. We can’t make them better, so let’s make it the best end of life that we can.”
Hannah, a yoga teacher, added her own reflections:
“At first, there was an element of disappointment when we realised Mum was too poorly to be moved to the hospice. But we soon saw what the Hospice at Home team could achieve at home – it was extraordinary. The personalised, gentle care made such a difference. We all felt safe, like a weight had been lifted. There was no rush, just calm, attentive support.”
For Stephen, having the Hospice at Home team alongside them made Heather’s wish to remain in her own home possible, surrounded by love.
“After a difficult and tiring year, we were so pleased to have their support,” he said. “They cared for Heather so tenderly and were there until the very end. It gave us the chance to be with her at home, just as she wanted.”
He added: “Both Heather’s and my own children have been a tower of strength during these early weeks after Heather died. It has been a difficult time for us all, but I’ve felt it important to share the message about this very special element of Pilgrims Hospices care. The Hospice at Home team made Heather’s end-of-life journey as comfortable as possible, and we will always be grateful.”
Heather’s family chose a green burial with close family and friends, followed by a celebration of her life at Eastwell Manor, where Hannah teaches yoga. Almost 200 family, friends and colleagues came together that day to remember Heather and celebrate the life of a much-loved wife, mum and friend.
“It was a joy to be surrounded by so much love,” Stephen shared.
In Heather’s memory, the family set up a Facebook fundraising page, which has raised more than £1,400 so far, to be shared between Pilgrims Hospices and the Lewy Body Dementia support group – a lasting tribute to Heather’s life and legacy.
Each year, Pilgrims Hospices care for thousands of people across east Kent, with services provided from its three hospice sites in Ashford, Canterbury, and Thanet, as well as in patients’ own homes. It costs over £17.2 million annually to run these services, much of which comes from the generous support of the local community.
7th October 2025
Michael: “Pilgrims care makes me feel at ease”
Michael Taylor was diagnosed with liver cancer in 2015. Initially given a 5-year prognosis, he exceeded this, and continues to live well at home in Herne Bay with support from Pilgrims Hospices.
Born in Bromley, Michael was raised by his mother, Winifred, and many doting aunts and uncles. His father, John James Taylor, was a firefighter, but sadly died aged 28, when Michael was just three days old.
After marrying his wife, Brenda, the couple moved to Faversham and started their own family, welcoming three children – Helen, Paul, who sadly died of cot death aged 14 months, and Rachel – and now have five grandchildren.
Michael and Brenda on their 50th wedding anniversary
Michael was referred to Pilgrims in 2021 and attended Time to Create, therapeutic art groups that run at the Therapy Centres on each hospice site, offering relief from the challenges of living with a terminal illness. By then, Brenda had Alzheimer’s disease, but she was able to accompany Michael to the groups.
Michael said: “The Pilgrims team was extremely good; they sat and chatted with Brenda while I got on and did my own thing. I enjoyed it very much.
“The food was so lovely too, beautiful! Especially the cheese omelettes. We attended Time to Create for quite a long time, but it eventually got too much for Brenda, so I stopped for a few years.”
Michael enjoyed a long career as an architectural technician. Initially working in London and Kent, he eventually ran his own practice – Rowlett and Taylor – in Broadstairs with his colleague, Malcolm. He continued to draw, paint and build models into his retirement, so Time to Create appealed to his natural artistic flair. He credits Pilgrims with getting him back into his creative hobbies:
“After Brenda went into a nursing home, I had a phone call from Elizabeth in the Pilgrims Wellbeing team asking if I’d like to re-join Time to Create.
“Pilgrims provided a taxi for me, which was amazing. I hadn’t done any art or drawing, hadn’t touched a paintbrush or pencil or anything, in those two years since I’d stopped going. That phone call from Elizabeth got me right back into it; making art at Pilgrims again got me completely turned around.
“I’m a bit of a loner, so I had just been sitting in a chair for two years doing absolutely nothing, and now I can’t stop painting and drawing!”
Michael Taylor Artwork 5
Michael Taylor Artwork 6
Michael’s artwork
Michael has been so well supported that he no longer feels he needs to attend the hospice Wellbeing groups, as Pilgrims has helped enable him to live comfortably at home. He does his own cooking, and has carers and a cleaner for extra support. He also enjoys visits from his children and grandchildren.
Michael now plans to attend his local Age UK group, which meets on Tuesdays, offering the chance to socialise with others and enjoy lunch together.
Michael continues to paint and draw, which is helping him to live as well and independently as possible. He recently sketched Herne Bay train station for his local model railway club, and is also a talented pianist; a church organist for 60 years, he now plays for his own pleasure.
Michael Taylor Artwork 7
Michael Taylor Artwork 3
Michael Taylor Artwork 2
Michael Taylor Artwork 1
Michael’s artwork
Although Michael doesn’t feel he needs Pilgrims at the moment, he knows he can access their support in the future:
“I’m not worried about death (can’t say I’m looking forward to it or wishing it was tomorrow!), but it doesn’t bother me because I have a strong Christian faith. I feel at ease, because if my health deteriorates, I can contact the hospice and go back into their care. Everybody I’ve met at Pilgrims is so kind – from the receptionists, to the catering and care teams, and everyone in between. They always make the time to sit and talk to me, even if they’re rushed off their feet.
“I would say to anybody who is in my situation – who is lonely and has lost interest – to ask Pilgrims about their Wellbeing groups, because I have found them really worthwhile. They get you out of yourself, and I’m so grateful to Pilgrims for inviting me to get involved.”
For more information on Pilgrims Hospices’ Wellbeing Programme:
Call the Pilgrims Hospices Advice Line on 01233 504 133
Each year, Pilgrims Hospices care for thousands of people across east Kent, with services provided from its three hospice sites in Ashford, Canterbury, and Thanet, as well as in patients’ own homes. It costs over £17.2 million annually to run these services, much of which comes from the generous support of the local community.
6th October 2025
Lily’s nursing journey at Pilgrims Hospices: “I’m lucky and honoured to be part of such an incredible team”
Lily Epps from Hythe was inspired to become a nurse after witnessing the care her mum, Ruth, received from Pilgrims Hospices when Lily was just 18 years old.
Initially training in Brighton, Lily moved home after six months and transferred to Canterbury Christ Church University to support her family after her mum died.
Lily shares why she chose to specialise in palliative care, and what she finds so rewarding about her role.
What drew you to palliative care, and why did you decide to work at Pilgrims Hospices?
Ruth and Lily
My mum was diagnosed with oesophageal cancer when I was 7; she was brilliant and resilient, and outlived an initial three-year prognosis by several years.
After conventional treatment and receiving the all clear, Mum went into remission and began experimental treatments. She worked closely with King’s College Hospital and took part in multiple trials; this fascinated me as I was growing up.
Unfortunately, the treatment didn’t work as we’d hoped, and Mum was referred to palliative care. I remember the Pilgrims nurses coming to visit her in our lounge, they always had an incredible aura of compassion. This really humbled me, and I wanted an opportunity to give back.
My mum always said it was the nurses who would make or break her day, and I strive to be a nurse that makes our patients’ days – especially in their final few days, when it is truly imperative.
I’m lucky and honoured to be part of such an incredible team at Pilgrims; everyone I work with is an inspiration, and so passionate about the care they give.
Lily Epps With Her Mum Ruth Epps 5
Lily Epps With Her Mum Ruth Epps 4
Lily Epps With Her Mum Ruth Epp 3
What does a typical day include for a Pilgrims nurse?
On the in-patient unit (IPU), we start the day with a cuppa to take to handover, which starts at 07:30am. One nurse takes charge and attends morning meetings which includes a whole multidisciplinary team (MDT) meeting, while a second nurse completes the morning medication round.
Depending on patients’ abilities, we’ll help our Healthcare Assistants (HCAs) to shower and bathe them. This is followed by a quick catch-up on the ward so that everyone is aware of any admissions or outstanding jobs, then we tag team going for a quick break before starting the lunchtime medication round.
In the afternoon, we update syringe drivers. We also complete pending discharge paperwork and give any medications needed. We focus on “what matters to me” for each patient, every day; this may be a very small goal, like having a bath, but it can completely change how they feel.
We always try our best to facilitate birthdays and wedding anniversaries. Our catering team provide beautiful cakes that can be enjoyed by families in the garden or in our lovely rooms. Even on long days, the evening quickly comes around, and we enjoy dinner before completing another medication round, settling patients, and handing over to the night staff.
What are the best things about being a nurse at Pilgrims?
Everything is amazing – including the food!
The whole team is incredible, from volunteers to social workers, wellbeing practitioners to consultants. It feels like a family. I’ve never worked anywhere so inclusive; everyone is so lovely, bubbly, down-to-earth and supportive. We all care about the patients and each other, which is clear on a daily basis.
I get more than seven weeks’ holiday per year, which shows how Pilgrims’ care and support extends to staff, too.
They also hold staff celebration days, and twice a year we’re offered therapeutic treatments like massage or reiki that fit around our working day.
What has your role involved and what have you learnt through working at Pilgrims?
I’ve learnt so much in my role at Pilgrims, mostly about different conditions, symptom control and treatment options. Every day is different. Most patients on the IPU come in for symptom control and usually stay with us for around two weeks, whereas the timeframe for our end-of-life patients varies.
I’ve worked with the Outcome Assessment and Complexity Collaborative (OACC) group. This is the collection of data used to measure, demonstrate, and improve the quality of palliative care for patients and their families by assessing clinical outcomes, symptom burden, and the complexity of care.
I also help the team to complete the Integrated Palliative Outcome Scale (IPOS)for patients. An IPOS allows us to integrate our care and ensure we aren’t missing anything, guaranteeing our patients are put first and that we continue to improve and meet their needs.
Do you have any favourite memories or anecdotes from your time at Pilgrims?
Simple things really bring me joy at Pilgrims.
Heart-shaped tattoo inspired by a patient’s legacy work
When patients come to us, they’ve often given up; they’ve been bed-bound and stuck inside for weeks. The light in their eyes when you say they can be wheeled outside on their bed and feel the sun on their face again leaves you with no words, and then there’s the cheeky smile when you offer a patient a beer or a glass of wine – these small things make working at Pilgrims so special.
We had an incredible patient who used to be a chef; as part of her legacy, she worked closely with our wonderful occupational therapy team to create a cookbook that is now sold on Amazon and can be shared with her children.
We helped a patient and her daughter do finger prints as part of the patient’s legacy work. The daughter got this as a tattoo in a heart shape, and her mum was able to see it before she died.
We helped to organise a patient’s birthday celebration in their room on the ward. She had two young sons, and one of them had his birthday shortly afterwards, so we did another celebration for him, too.
We decorated their mum’s room whilst she was showering, then surprised her and sang happy birthday; it was a beautiful moment.
A patient’s birthday celebration on the Ashford hospice ward
One patient, Celia, and her husband, Robert, celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary whilst Celia was in the hospice.
We’d had to remove Celia’s wedding ring because her fingers were swollen. I didn’t want that to be her memory of her final wedding anniversary, so I asked the kitchen to organise a surprise afternoon tea and help me set it up in the garden, and they whizzed up scones and finger sandwiches.
Celia had been bed-bound for a week, but she wanted to go outside, which we discovered via her IPOS (this is why they’re invaluable, and make the hospice so unique). We washed and dressed Celia, then carefully transferred her from her bed into the garden. Robert met us outside with the afternoon tea all set up and decorated just for them.
It’s such a happy place to work; no one wants their final days to be sad, humans are so resilient, and it’s humbling and inspiring being part of the hospice team.
Lily with Celia and Robert at their 50th wedding anniversary afternoon tea
Did you have any preconceptions about hospice care before you worked at Pilgrims?
I was lucky to experience the hospice as a visitor prior to joining the team, as I’d seen first-hand what a joyful environment it is.
People often have the misconception that hospices are all doom and gloom, but in reality they shine such a bright, positive light.
Of course there are hard days, but they bring the team closer together, as it’s such a supportive environment. There can be hard conversations, too, but you are supported to have them, with the opportunity to debrief afterwards.
Most patients understand why they’re here and just want to enjoy their final days, so it’s important to put them first and try make their wishes come true.
Why is hospice care important?
There is no greater privilege than supporting someone through the final days of their life. Pilgrims promote quality of life; we try our best to ensure patients don’t suffer, supporting them to die with peace and dignity. Although patients are our priority, we’re holistic in our approach; families are an extension of our patients, so when a patient dies, we continue to care for family members who need us.
The services that Pilgrims offer always melt my heart.
Stepping Stones is a bereavement support group run by the wonderful Annie Hogben, Expert Volunteer Development Lead, which is available to any adult living in east Kent, even if their loved one was not a patient of the hospice.
Another element I find so wonderful about Pilgrims is their legacy work; from hand casting and creating family trees, to voice recordings through the Blackbird Projectthat can be cherished forever.
This is all provided by the charity, which I think is truly incredible, and shows how unbelievably special Pilgrims is.
Pilgrims Hospices is currently recruiting for Registered General Nurses at our Ashford hospice.
If you have relevant experience and have been inspired by Lily’s story:
Pilgrims Hospices provides compassionate, specialist care free of charge to thousands of people in east Kent each year who are living with life-limiting conditions. Support is offered in patients’ homes, in the community, and at our three hospice sites in Canterbury, Thanet and Ashford. We also run a 24-hour advice line.
5th October 2025
Hundreds get covered in colour for Pilgrims Hospices care
Wow! What a wonderful, happy and windy atmosphere seeing everyone again at this year’s Pilgrims Hospices Thanet 5k Colour Run, which took centre stage at Palm Bay, Cliftonville, Margate on Sunday 5 October 2025.
With over 400 Pilgrims Hospices supporters participating and raising an impressive £235k plus in the nine years the event has taken place for hospice end-of-life care in east Kent, it’s clear that the event made a significant impact.
Karen Kenward, Fundraising Manager, and the entire team deserve commendation for their hard work and dedication in organising such a successful event.
It’s heart-warming to see the community coming together on a most spectacular day in Cliftonville. It was exciting to see so many familiar faces; families and friends coming together to enjoy a colourful fun day while also supporting our local charity.
3 Colour Run 2025 4
2 Colour Run 2025 3
Colour Run 2025 2
Colour Run 2025 5
Bex leading the warm-up
The fact that the weather was rather windy this year only added to the joy and vibrancy of the occasion.
A brilliant way to kick off the Colour Run event was with fitness expert Bex, who did a fun warm-up for all. The dynamic and energetic warm-up session was full of fun dance moves, and prepared everyone for the colourful and exciting spectacle ahead. With cool dance music playing, participants were encouraged to move, stretch, and get their hearts pumping, creating a lively atmosphere prior to a colour blast.
Karen said:
“The money raised today will undoubtedly go a long way in providing crucial support and care for those in need in the community. The Thanet 5k Colour Run is not only a fantastic way to raise money, but also a beautiful example of how communities can unite for a great cause and raise awareness for our charity. A huge well done to everyone who supported us on the day, and here’s to many more successful events in the future!”
Karen added:
“I would like to take the opportunity to say a huge thank you to our sponsors –Stagecoach, Copyshop and Mini Stores in Deal. Also, thank you for the support of Margate Ambulance, Academy Radio, Isle of Thanet, Frank Leppard for his incredible photos, Pete our DJ, and lastly to Fundraising Assistant, Annie Pritchard, Pilgrims staff and volunteers who help support me in making this event so special each year, come wind, rain or shine!I think I can truly say we’ve all had a real colour blast of a day today and we couldn’t run the event without everyone’s wonderful support. Thank you all once again!”
Annie Pritchard, Fundraising Assistant, with husband and volunteer, Reg
Pilgrims Hospices provides compassionate, specialist care free of charge to thousands of people in east Kent each year who are living with life-limiting conditions. Support is offered in patients’ homes, in the community, and at our three hospice sites in Canterbury, Thanet and Ashford. We also run a 24-hour advice line.
3rd October 2025
Norman and Christine’s story: “Pilgrims is always there if you need them”
Norman Sole from Walmer experienced Pilgrims Hospices’ care when his wife, Christine, was cared for by the charity.
Inspired by the kindness they were shown by Pilgrims, Norman and his family wanted to give back so that others can benefit from the same compassionate care.
Their story shows how Pilgrims continue to look after families into bereavement, often playing a very special role in their lives as they navigate their grief.
Norman and Christine were married for 57 years and had two children, Mike and Jeannie. Christine worked as a telephonist before marrying Norman. They had a plant nursery until they retired; Christine picked tomatoes in the large greenhouses. She loved gardening, knitting, her pet cats, and line dancing.
Christine Sole With Her Daughter Jeanette 1
Norman And Christine Sole 4
Christine Sole 4
Christine Sole With Son Mike 1
Norman And Christine Sole 5
Norman And Christine Sole 2
Christine Sole 8
Norman And Christine Sole 7
Norman And Christine Sole 1
Christine Sole 3
Later in life, Christine was diagnosed with oesophageal cancer; initially cured by chemotherapy, it sadly returned and became terminal. Whilst in hospital, a doctor asked Christine if she wanted to be referred to the hospice.
Mike and Jeannie said:
“Mum was hospitalised, with the aim being to fit a stent in her throat. She went in expecting to come home. Unfortunately, the procedure didn’t work, so palliative care became the only option. She went downhill very quickly.
“They moved Mum to a private room, and the next day someone from the palliative care team came and asked if she’d like to go into the hospice. We all agreed that this would be for the best.”
Christine
Christine spent five days in the Thanet hospice; she died on 6 August 2023, aged 81.
Norman said:
“A friend had been in the Canterbury hospice several years prior, and I’d visited them there, but that had been my only experience until Christine was referred.
“The hospital was very noisy, people come and go all the time; Christine kept saying, “I wish it was quieter in here.” In hospital, we were always doing things for her because the staff were so busy, they didn’t have time, so we were trying to think about what she wanted.
“Once we went into the hospice, it was instantly calm, a completely different atmosphere. It was like someone had taken the responsibility of care from us, so that we could look after ourselves and be a family. We didn’t expect anything, but the hospice team anticipated our needs, and made us feel part of the wider Pilgrims family.”
Jeannie agreed: “Pilgrims caters incredibly well for families. It was my birthday whilst Mum was in the hospice; she mentioned it to the hospice staff, and they brought me a cake with a candle, and a birthday card! It’s those little things that really make a big difference.
Christine with one of her beloved cats
“I also felt much calmer in the hospice. As a family, we wouldn’t all usually spend a week together like that; it sounds weird, but after Mum died, I missed us having lunch together every day, walking around the gardens, getting a coffee. We never felt like we shouldn’t be there, like we were in the way, or that we should leave if we’d been there all day. I missed that when it was over, it was a very special time.
“It’s one of those things you hope you never have to go through, but it couldn’t have been a better experience.”
Mike added:
“All the staff were lovely. We felt the nursing staff really cared, and that Mum wasn’t just another patient. The focus in the hospice is different; when Mum was in hospital, they were trying to make her better. But once we knew she was at the end of life, and we’d had a few days to adjust, our mindset shifted – it became about keeping Mum comfortable for the time she had left.”
To say thank you for the care they received, Norman and his family now support Pilgrims in many ways, including taking part in annual remembrance events like Sunflower Memories and Trees of Love. Mike also completed the Folkestone Downs Challenge with his daughter, Eleanor, and his wife, Helen, volunteers at the Canterbury hospice with patients who attend wellbeing groups.
Most recently, Norman decided to grow sunflowers in his garden after attending Sunflower Memories. He entered Walmer in Bloom for the first time in 2025, and his sunflowers won first prize in the Best Garden Display category.
Norman with his children, Mike and Jeannie, and his award-winning sunflowersNorman at the Walmer in Bloom award ceremony
Norman received the letter telling him he’d won on 6 August 2025, the two-year anniversary of Christine’s death:
“It made a very sad day a little bit happier. I got into growing sunflowers after we attended the Sunflower Memories event to celebrate Christine’s life, so winning the Walmer in Bloom award was extra special.”
Norman attended an award presentation at Walmer Castle, where he received a certificate, and he donated his prize money to Pilgrims.
Mike added:
“Pilgrims support families even after their loved one has died, which is really positive. It’s so nice that they’ve kept in touch with Dad; he enjoys keeping up to date with hospice news and events. The little things we’re able to do, like supporting the remembrance events in memory of Mum, allows us to give back, so that other people can benefit like we did.”
Norman agreed:
“Pilgrims don’t just fade away, they’re always there if you need them.”
Each year, Pilgrims Hospices care for thousands of people across east Kent, with services provided from its three hospice sites in Ashford, Canterbury, and Thanet, as well as in patients’ own homes. It costs over £17.2 million annually to run these services, much of which comes from the generous support of the local community.
