Norman and Christine’s story: “Pilgrims is always there if you need them”
Norman Sole from Walmer experienced Pilgrims Hospices’ care when his wife, Christine, was cared for by the charity.
Inspired by the kindness they were shown by Pilgrims, Norman and his family wanted to give back so that others can benefit from the same compassionate care.
Their story shows how Pilgrims continue to look after families into bereavement, often playing a very special role in their lives as they navigate their grief.
Norman and Christine were married for 57 years and had two children, Mike and Jeannie. Christine worked as a telephonist before marrying Norman. They had a plant nursery until they retired; Christine picked tomatoes in the large greenhouses. She loved gardening, knitting, her pet cats, and line dancing.
Christine Sole With Her Daughter Jeanette 1
Norman And Christine Sole 4
Christine Sole 4
Christine Sole With Son Mike 1
Norman And Christine Sole 5
Norman And Christine Sole 2
Christine Sole 8
Norman And Christine Sole 7
Norman And Christine Sole 1
Christine Sole 3
Later in life, Christine was diagnosed with oesophageal cancer; initially cured by chemotherapy, it sadly returned and became terminal. Whilst in hospital, a doctor asked Christine if she wanted to be referred to the hospice.
Mike and Jeannie said:
“Mum was hospitalised, with the aim being to fit a stent in her throat. She went in expecting to come home. Unfortunately, the procedure didn’t work, so palliative care became the only option. She went downhill very quickly.
“They moved Mum to a private room, and the next day someone from the palliative care team came and asked if she’d like to go into the hospice. We all agreed that this would be for the best.”
Christine
Christine spent five days in the Thanet hospice; she died on 6 August 2023, aged 81.
Norman said:
“A friend had been in the Canterbury hospice several years prior, and I’d visited them there, but that had been my only experience until Christine was referred.
“The hospital was very noisy, people come and go all the time; Christine kept saying, “I wish it was quieter in here.” In hospital, we were always doing things for her because the staff were so busy, they didn’t have time, so we were trying to think about what she wanted.
“Once we went into the hospice, it was instantly calm, a completely different atmosphere. It was like someone had taken the responsibility of care from us, so that we could look after ourselves and be a family. We didn’t expect anything, but the hospice team anticipated our needs, and made us feel part of the wider Pilgrims family.”
Jeannie agreed: “Pilgrims caters incredibly well for families. It was my birthday whilst Mum was in the hospice; she mentioned it to the hospice staff, and they brought me a cake with a candle, and a birthday card! It’s those little things that really make a big difference.
Christine with one of her beloved cats
“I also felt much calmer in the hospice. As a family, we wouldn’t all usually spend a week together like that; it sounds weird, but after Mum died, I missed us having lunch together every day, walking around the gardens, getting a coffee. We never felt like we shouldn’t be there, like we were in the way, or that we should leave if we’d been there all day. I missed that when it was over, it was a very special time.
“It’s one of those things you hope you never have to go through, but it couldn’t have been a better experience.”
Mike added:
“All the staff were lovely. We felt the nursing staff really cared, and that Mum wasn’t just another patient. The focus in the hospice is different; when Mum was in hospital, they were trying to make her better. But once we knew she was at the end of life, and we’d had a few days to adjust, our mindset shifted – it became about keeping Mum comfortable for the time she had left.”
To say thank you for the care they received, Norman and his family now support Pilgrims in many ways, including taking part in annual remembrance events like Sunflower Memories and Trees of Love. Mike also completed the Folkestone Downs Challenge with his daughter, Eleanor, and his wife, Helen, volunteers at the Canterbury hospice with patients who attend wellbeing groups.
Most recently, Norman decided to grow sunflowers in his garden after attending Sunflower Memories. He entered Walmer in Bloom for the first time in 2025, and his sunflowers won first prize in the Best Garden Display category.
Norman with his children, Mike and Jeannie, and his award-winning sunflowersNorman at the Walmer in Bloom award ceremony
Norman received the letter telling him he’d won on 6 August 2025, the two-year anniversary of Christine’s death:
“It made a very sad day a little bit happier. I got into growing sunflowers after we attended the Sunflower Memories event to celebrate Christine’s life, so winning the Walmer in Bloom award was extra special.”
Norman attended an award presentation at Walmer Castle, where he received a certificate, and he donated his prize money to Pilgrims.
Mike added:
“Pilgrims support families even after their loved one has died, which is really positive. It’s so nice that they’ve kept in touch with Dad; he enjoys keeping up to date with hospice news and events. The little things we’re able to do, like supporting the remembrance events in memory of Mum, allows us to give back, so that other people can benefit like we did.”
Norman agreed:
“Pilgrims don’t just fade away, they’re always there if you need them.”
Each year, Pilgrims Hospices care for thousands of people across east Kent, with services provided from its three hospice sites in Ashford, Canterbury, and Thanet, as well as in patients’ own homes. It costs over £17.2 million annually to run these services, much of which comes from the generous support of the local community.
22nd September 2025
Trees of Love: Jade’s story
Jade remembers her nan, Viv, and her mother and father-in-law through Pilgrims Hospices’ Trees of Love campaign, after they all received care from the charity in 2024.
Jade’s grandparents
My nan, Viv, was the heart of our family – a devoted wife to my Grandad Bill; a loving mum to Melissa and Alister, and a proud nan to myself, Grace and Jacob. She made every birthday special with homemade cakes, and every holiday memorable, whether it was a trip to Menorca or a week at Butlins.
Nan was a teaching assistant at a local school for over 30 years, and was so generous with her time to students and colleagues – always with kind words and on standby for a cuddle. She put her teaching knowledge to good use each evening when watching her favourite quiz shows, The Chase and Who Wants to Be a Millionaire!
When Nan was diagnosed with cancer, we required an extra helping hand at home. All of ours and Nan’s fears were put to ease when we were introduced to Pilgrims. She felt so comfortable, and at peace, with the Hospice at Home team. They managed to make her smile and giggle when some days felt darker than others.
My Grandad suffered a stroke in 2022, which left him bed-bound, and Nan’s nurses made sure that their beds were pushed together so they could fall asleep holding hands, just like they used to. It was those little things that brought a lot of comfort to them, and to us as a family. It was lovely to discover that she had been supporting Pilgrims with a monthly donation for many years, even before she needed their support.
Jade with her grandparents
Pilgrims’ care extended to us all; I received bereavement counselling to help me process my loss after Nan passed in September 2024.
From the reception volunteers to the counsellor I worked with, everyone was so unbelievably kind. It was when I was waiting for one of the sessions that I saw the leaflet for Trees of Love, and I knew I wanted to dedicate a dove in memory of my nan and for my mum and father-in-law who also sadly passed that year, with support from Pilgrims in their final days.
Participating in Trees of Love helped make our first Christmas without our loved ones feel that little bit more special. The service was so calming, which reminded me of my nan, and it was such a comfort to see our doves lit up on the tree.
Our family will forever be grateful to Pilgrims Hospices for everything; supporting such a great cause at such a special time of year makes it that extra bit more meaningful.
Pilgrims Hospices provides compassionate, specialist care free of charge to thousands of people in east Kent each year who are living with life-limiting conditions. Support is offered in patients’ homes, in the community, and at our three hospice sites in Canterbury, Thanet and Ashford. We also run a 24-hour advice line.
5th August 2025
Memory Tree: Tina’s story
Tina remembers her partner, Michael, and shares why she supports Pilgrims Hospices by dedicating a leaf to him on the Memory Tree, to say thank you for the care he received.
Michael was a gentleman from the moment I met him: kind, caring, generous and considerate. His humour was of a silly nature and his generosity knew no bounds. He used to walk me home from work, carrying my shopping, and always made sure to lock the door behind me when I got in. Eventually, he asked me to dinner and from then, we would go onto spend 15 wonderful years together.
He loved his family very much, and always encouraged them, and anyone he met, to strive for the stars and follow their dreams. He loved comforts close to him like a beer and a bet on a Sunday with his friends, fishing and following his beloved Chelsea Football Club. But also loved adventures far and wide, such as our annual travels to India. Each year, we went for longer than the last.
We were introduced to Pilgrims when Michael was diagnosed and they did everything to make him comfortable, making sure to take the time to explain everything in plain English so it was easy for him to understand.
Every single person who works and volunteers there went above and beyond – truly, they are amazing, special people.
We spent lots of time in the gardens with Michael’s family, and his nurses were always there to get him ready. There was one occasion where he wanted to go out and enjoy the rain, but realising just how cold it was, he decided against it. Instead, they situated him so he was able to watch the world from his room. It was such a simple act, but it meant so much, a true moment of care. Initially, I wanted Michael to spend his final days at home, but he remarked on how comfortable he felt at the Ashford hospice, so at peace. In hindsight, I’m so glad that is where he was.
Michael
When Michael was being cared for in the hospice, I used to sit in the cafe area, and always took note of the Memory Tree. Our home was always filled with trees, a reflection of his love for the outdoors. To me, they represent life, nature, the changing of the seasons and regrowth. To remember Michael on the Memory Tree is so special. It shows love for many from many. It’s a comfort to me that his leaf is surrounded by other heartfelt dedications, fitting for a man who loved people.
Pilgrims Hospices provides compassionate, specialist care free of charge to more than 3,000 people in east Kent each year who are living with life-limiting conditions. Support is offered in patients’ homes, in the community, and at our three hospice sites in Canterbury, Thanet and Ashford. We also run a 24-hour advice line.
5th June 2025
Why I support Pilgrims Hospices: Sarah’s story
“I always imagined hospices were marvellous places, but until I experienced it myself, I didn’t know just how exceptional everything and everyone would be.”
My Dad was a true Londoner – bold, big-hearted and full of life. His voice could fill a room, and so could his warmth. He was so generous with his time and embodied the spirit of community in every way, proudly inheriting the family picture-frame making business ‘Mann & Sons.’ In his later years, he moved to Kent and found real comfort in the slower pace of life and bracing sea air.
After Dad had his stroke, it was heart-breaking to see someone who had always been so strong and independent suddenly become so vulnerable. As his final days were drawing closer, he told me that he wanted to die at home, but this wasn’t possible since he needed too much attention.
In the end, however, I feel very grateful that he ended up in the care of the Thanet hospice. It was the best thing that could’ve happened and from the moment we came through the door, I knew we were in fantastic hands.
The small things will always stay with me: the hand-knitted quilts on each bed, to the radio that appeared in his room after I mentioned his love of listening to it. These thoughtful touches, to me, show the true meaning of care – acts of decency, kindness and generosity given for nothing in return.
Sarah and her dad
There are many touching moments I recall in those difficult days, but the one that sticks in my mind most is sharing Dad’s final sunset with him. He’d asked for this specifically and even though the nurses were busy, at shift’s end, they made the time to attach rollers to his bed and wheel him outside. I sat with him, holding his hand, and we watched the sky turn red. I could see what this meant to him.
Twelve hours later, he lapsed into unconsciousness – I had slept in a chair by his bed until that moment and the nurses brought me a blanket for the night. I carried on sleeping there until the moment he died, and afterwards helped the nurses and volunteers bathe him and dress him in clean pyjamas. Their compassion and respect was astonishing, and after they’d taken him away, they handed me an envelope addressed ‘Sarah’ containing a hand-knitted heart and a poem. I still have them both.
My Dad has been gone close to three years now, but I feel his spirit in everything I do. He passed at 80 and when people say he had a good life – and he really did – it doesn’t lessen the loss. Keeping his memory alive is so important to me, and seeing his name on the Memory Tree really touches me. I wanted to support Pilgrims yearly, and it’s such a wonderful way to do so, on a beautiful installation where his memory is kept alive.
I will never be able to repay Pilgrims Hospices for everything they did – they care for the people sitting around the bed as much as the person lying in it. Leaving a gift to Pilgrims in my Will is my way of saying one final thank you, in memory of my Dad and with deep gratitude for all they did for both of us.
If you’re inspired by Sarah’s story and would like to support Pilgrims Hospices, there are many ways you can:
Each year, Pilgrims Hospices care for thousands of people across east Kent, with services provided from its three hospice sites in Ashford, Canterbury, and Thanet, as well as in patients’ own homes. It costs over £17.2 million annually to run these services, much of which comes from the generous support of the local community.
2nd January 2025
Bed Appeal update: Thank you, you did it!
Pilgrims Healthcare Assistants accepting the delivery of beds at the Canterbury hospice
A huge, heartfelt thank you to everyone who kindly supported Pilgrims Hospices Bed Appeal, raising £166,853 to purchase 36 new specialist beds for our hospices in Canterbury, Thanet and Ashford.
Thank you for giving our patients a good night’s sleep.
The response we received was nothing short of overwhelming, and we cannot thank you enough for helping us to reach this incredible goal. The widespread generosity shown by individuals, companies and trusts has ensured patients remain as comfortable as possible for those precious days spent in our hospices.
These beds make such a meaningful difference in the lives of those we care for, and will prove vital in providing comfort and safety to the over 900 people that need them every year.
Pilgrims Hospices’ journey began with just two beds at the Canterbury hospice in 1982, and our services have grown each and every year to meet the needs of the local community.
Our growth has only been possible because of the kind and generous support we continue to receive from people like you. We simply couldn’t do it without you, thank you.
It’s only possible for us to offer the much-needed care and comfort our patients deserve with these specialist beds. Thank you to everyone who has helped make this a reality, you really have made a world of difference.
Laura and Sarah, Senior Ward Sisters
The new beds make such a difference, and are particularly special as they are fully adjustable.
They have bedside controls, which patients, their families and Pilgrims staff can use to help find a comfortable position.
The beds can be lowered down to the floor, reducing the risk of falls for patients, and allowing Pilgrims nurses to work safely.
When paired with specialist floor mats, these beds can be made into doubles, so precious nights can be spent close together with family.
The side-rails can be lowered, or removed, to allow loved ones to cuddle one another.
Have you supported the Bed Appeal? Find your name on the Wall of Fame!
Thank you so much for your support
Every generous donation from our amazing community of supporters helps to make sure we can be there for the next family who needs us.
Pilgrims Hospices is a charity dedicated to providing expert care and support to patients with life-limiting illnesses in east Kent. Our services ensure comfort, dignity, and quality of life for patients and their families, offering compassionate care both in hospice settings and in the community.
19th November 2024
Trees of Love: East Kent’s largest remembrance grows even bigger in 2024
This December, Pilgrims Hospices has once again partnered with members of the local community to deliver east Kent’s largest remembrance.
Herne Bay Crematorium and St Alphege Church join Pilgrims to offer more people the space to remember this Christmas.
The charity, which provides end-of-life care, is pleased to announce services in Whitstable and Herne Bay have joined the remembrance this year. The services give those who are grieving the time and space to remember during the festive season.
Those taking part are invited to dedicate a dove to be illuminated on Christmas trees across east Kent, and come together at one of the remembrance services with carols. It’s an opportunity to share memories, and take a moment during the busy festive season to remember those we love.
“Christmas is that time of year which consists of many different feelings, joy, excitement, love. But it is also for many a time for reflecting about the loved ones we have lost. The tree of love is a symbol of peace, memories and of course love. This simple gesture can bring a community together, and at Herne Bay Crematorium we are honoured to work with Pilgrims Hospices and help those on their journey of reflection.”
Damien Corlett-Oates, Herne Bay Crematorium Manager
The service at Herne Bay Crematorium is taking place on Friday 20 December, at 5pm, and those attending are invited to stay for warm refreshments of mulled wine and mince pies afterwards.
“Here at St Alphege Whitstable we are delighted to be holding a Trees of Love service with Pilgrims Hospices for the first time. Christmas is a time for fond remembrance of loved ones who used to share in our celebrations. We hope that all who come may feel the comfort and joy of gathering together and the light of hope during this festive season.”
Isobel Legg, Reader, St Alphege
The St Alphege, Whitstable service is on Sunday 8 December, at 4pm, with festive refreshments served afterwards in the church.
Pilgrims are also hosting their hospice services on Saturday 7 December, in Canterbury, Thanet and Ashford.
Each year, Pilgrims Hospices care for thousands of people across east Kent, with services provided from its three hospice sites in Ashford, Canterbury, and Thanet, as well as in patients’ own homes. It costs over £17.2 million annually to run these services, much of which comes from the generous support of the local community.
