My mother, Dorothy, was one of a kind, a dedicated nurse for more than 40 years with the NHS and above all an absolute inspiration to her family, friends and colleagues. I have been asked to share my story about my beautiful mother, but there are no words to truly express what a wonderful woman she truly was.
In the later part of her career, she was a theatre sister and worked with many consultants in the Head and Neck team. I, too, now work within Head and Neck at the William Harvey Hospital, working with the same consultants and I often hear how wonderful Mum was. She was a force to be reckoned with in the best way! Keeping everyone in check and putting her patients first. In fact, the manager of theatres told me: “Dorothy taught me everything I know”.
Another example of Mum’s calibre was completing the Moonwalk with me in 2019. We walked 26 miles from midnight to 8am. This was an amazing achievement, but what many people didn’t realise was that Mum had sprained her ankle the week before and was in a lot of pain. She refused to give up! It took her well over a month to recover from walking that distance. We raised over £1,500 between us for those suffering with breast cancer.
We were lucky enough to be able to keep Mum in the family home throughout her illness, but the contact we had with the hospice was second to none. Whenever we had a query it was answered immediately. Whenever we needed a doctor or a nurse, they were there. They truly were a shining light in a very dark time.
Laura
Unfortunately, Mum was diagnosed with cancer in March 2020. It couldn’t have been a worse time as the country experienced its first lock down. It meant we were unable to spend as much time with her, which was very difficult indeed.
She tried a few different treatments but they were unsuccessful, and so she made the brave decision to spend her last few months with family and doing what she could to make memories.
That’s where Pilgrims stepped in. We were lucky enough to be able to keep Mum in the family home throughout her illness, but the contact we had with the hospice was second to none. Whenever we had a query it was answered immediately. Whenever we needed a doctor or a nurse, they were there. They truly were a shining light in a very dark time. They helped us with aids to help Mum move around more easily: different cushions, frames and eventually a hospital bed.
We were also able to take advantage of bereavement counselling after Mum passed. This really helped and was so valuable to us. I am now studying Psychotherapy due to the impact that such a service had on me during the worst time of my life.
We were so very grateful that we all wanted to contribute as a tribute to Mum after she had passed. My father, who has lost the love of his life, gave a donation. My brother raised money by setting up a fishing competition at Hythe. My sister-in-law did a tandem sky dive and I completed a wing qalk. I think that dedication to raising money for Pilgrims speaks volumes about how our family feel.
Thank you Pilgrims, for all that you do; thank you.
Pilgrims Hospices care for thousands of local people each year, free of charge, during the most challenging time in their lives. They offer care and support in people’s own homes, in the community and in their inpatient units as well as running a 24-hour advice line.
5th March 2023
The fine art of looking after Pilgrims supporters
Pilgrims Hospices Supporter Relations team are the listening ears, guiding people through the immensely important journey of making a donation, whether through fundraising, in memory or legacy giving.
This team is surprisingly small, consisting of just three dedicated and knowledgeable individuals, whose skills help to make gifting to Pilgrims Hospices a warm and memorable experience.
Picking up the telephone to make a donation could be one of the most challenging things to do, especially as this can evoke memories of troubled and sad times. Speaking to a skilled and compassionate member of Pilgrims Supporter Relations team can be the beginning of a long and successful relationship as a donor, making a difference to people who need Pilgrims’ care now and into the future.
Hannah Sole, Supporter Relations Manager has a wealth of almost nine years of experience with the team. She joined with her administration skills, and now heads up the team who can handle hundreds of calls and enquiries from supporters each month.
When we volunteer at events, it’s lovely to meet face to face with some of the people we’ve spoken to on the phone, they are always heart-warming moments.
Hannah, Supporter Relations Manager
Hannah explained: “It’s a diverse role, and the team is trained to handle all aspects of the job, therefore any one of us can help with any enquiry.
“We process donations, event registrations, and compile the data for colleagues in order for them to run challenges and fundraisers throughout the year.
“Last year, the team processed almost 54,000 donations from our generous supporters. We deal with most departments across the charity, and on all three sites in Canterbury, Ashford and Thanet, whether it’s financial or supporter and fundraising led. We mail more than 7,000 letters each year, conveying thanks for donating or registering to get involved.
The team are regularly found volunteering at events on the registration desks, marshalling supporters or presenting finishers medals, amongst many other things.
Hannah added: “When we volunteer at events, it’s lovely to meet face to face with some of the people we’ve spoken to on the phone, they are always heart-warming moments. And, this can really help us to understand more about the people who support us and how we can best help them with our roles within the team.”
Toby Frost is the newest member of the team with 18 months of Pilgrims experience, he said: “I never get a Monday morning feeling with this job.
“It really is no accident that people come to work for Pilgrims Hospices, my mother-in-law was cared for by the Ashford team, and I’d seen first hand how people have the very best care to support their quality of life until the very end.
“My wife Jane saw the job vacancy advertised, I had become disillusioned with working for a large company, I just wanted to have a role that would help to make things better in the world. Jane knew this would be a brilliant role for me, and I applied and was offered the job. It’s great not to have that sinking Sunday feeling anymore.”
Speaking with people about their donations and enquiries is so interesting, if not very emotional sometimes. However, I’m always rewarded with knowing I’m helping our supporters to do something very special and ensuring that Pilgrims can continue with important care in our community.
Toby, Supporter Relations team
When asked if he had a particular favourite part of the job, Toby said: “Speaking with people about their donations and enquiries is so interesting, if not very emotional sometimes. However, I’m always rewarded with knowing I’m helping our supporters to do something very special and ensuring that Pilgrims can continue with important care in our community.
“With training, I’ve learned new skills and adapted existing ones to meet the compassionate environment that I work in. I’m very proud to be part of the team.
“Everything here at Pilgrims is so inclusive, we work closely with our clinical and non-clinical colleagues to provide the very best care for the patients and their families.
“I particularly love lunchtimes at the hospice, I get a chance to meet volunteers and colleagues from across the charity in our staff cafe.
“The catering team provide the most amazing menus, to meet the individual needs of patients and also the best lunchtime meals for staff and visitors; there’s always something lovely to try!”
Pilgrims’ Supporter Relations team
Trisha Smith has been a valued member of the team for over three years.
She told us: “I’ve always been an active fundraiser, ever since I can remember, supporting charities by taking on challenges and raising funds for important causes.
“I also have personal experience with Pilgrims Hospices; my dad died at the Canterbury hospice in 2009. The care we received was very special, I was also looked after by the bereavement team after Dad’s death. Thereafter, I became a regular Pilgrims’ volunteer, helping at, or taking part in fundraising events, and helping with donation bucket collections. I have a background in administration and education and knew that I’d like to be part of the Pilgrims Hospices workforce. I regularly checked the Pilgrims website for vacancies and applied when I saw the Supporter Relations role appear.
“I really enjoy all aspects of my job, helping people with queries regarding donations, listening to their stories, and generally being able to allow them to speak freely about their Pilgrims experiences.”
The team are sometimes one of the first calls that a grieving family member has made after the death of someone close to them; people find comfort in speaking to someone who knows about the hospices and the care and support offered here.
What could appear to be a quite a simple day-to-day role within the charity, is actually a very important cog in the Pilgrims’ wheel. We hope this small insight into our friendly trio will help you to feel comfortable and able to pick up the phone if you need to, and speak with your supporter relations team.
To find out more about the different ways you can donate to Pilgrims Hospices, visit pilgrimshospices.org/donate.
Pilgrims Hospices cares for thousands of local people each year, free of charge, during the most challenging time in their lives. They offer care and support in people’s own homes, in the community and in their inpatient units as well as running a 24-hour advice line.
1st March 2023
Make a Will Month returns to Pilgrims Hospices
In April 2023, eight solicitor firms across east Kent are generously giving their time and expertise to write or update Wills, in exchange for donations to Pilgrims Hospices.
In the UK, nearly 60% of adults do not have a Will. By making your appointment via Pilgrims’ Make a Will Month scheme, you can ensure your wishes will be fulfilled when you’re gone.
Solicitors across east Kent will waive their fees to write or update Wills, with all proceeds going directly towards providing local hospice care. Since its inception in 2013, the scheme has raised over £185,000 for Pilgrims, and has helped over 1,000 local people to make or update their Wills.
Each year, the participating firms are invited in to one of the hospices to discuss the upcoming scheme. This year, they were joined by Sophie Van Walwyk, Head of Psychosocial and Wellbeing Services, who gave the solicitors an insight into the vital work the hospice does with their patients in the Therapy Centres.
Sophie said: “Part of the vital work we do at the hospice is supporting our patients and their families plan for their death. If you need to make or update your Will, there really is no better way to do it, knowing that you’ll also be making a huge difference to the lives of so many people who benefit from our care in the most difficult of times.”
These local solicitor firms are taking part in Make a Will Month 2023:
Boys & Maughan
Gardner Croft
Girlings
Mowll & Mowll
Prospero Solicitors
Robinson Allfree
Stilwell & Singleton
Whitehead Monckton
Visit pilgrimshospices.org/makeawill for further information on suggested donation amounts, and to see a full list of participating solicitor branches.
Pilgrims Hospices cares for thousands of local people each year, free of charge, during the most challenging time in their lives. They offer care and support in people’s own homes, in the community and in their inpatient units as well as running a 24-hour advice line.
31st January 2023
Always Caring: Philip’s story
As a member of Pilgrims Hospices Always Caring, Philip Hurst supports the charity with a monthly donation, to give back for the care and support he and his wife, Gill, received.
My first experience with Pilgrims Hospices was in 2015 when my wife, Gill, was referred by Kent and Canterbury Hospital. She remained as an in-patient at the Canterbury hospice for four weeks in January, until I was able to transfer her home. With the help of Pilgrims Hospices, I was able to convert our sitting room with a hospital bed and all the equipment we needed to care for her. A year later, Gill was re-admitted to the Canterbury hospice for what proved to be her last five days.
After losing Gill, I was supported by the bereavement team at Pilgrims with one-to-one counselling, as well as group sessions with two counsellors three months later, which I benefitted from greatly.
So, every time I receive a request for support, I’m happy to give it. I was pleased to make a regular direct debit to Always Caring. It gives me the opportunity to maintain a background level of support and continue to help the place that cared for my wife.
None of us know when we might need hospice care, but with your support we can continue to be here for local people when they need us most.
By giving regularly to Pilgrims Hospices you can help us be here, Always Caring for our patients and their families.
Each year, Pilgrims Hospices give care and comfort to thousands of people in east Kent who are coming to terms with an illness that sadly cannot be cured. The charity support patients to live life as well as possible until the very end, free from pain and distress.
23rd December 2022
East Kent’s largest remembrance services returned in December 2022
Pilgrims Hospices’ Trees of Love saw thousands come together to remember loved ones in December 2022.
Pilgrims Hospices welcomed over 2,000 local people to their Trees of Love remembrance services, held at venues across east Kent during the first weeks of December 2022.
Each year, Pilgrims host remembrance services with carols in the grounds of their three hospices at Ashford, Canterbury and Thanet, where huge festive trees are lit up in memory of lost loved ones. Adorned with beautiful doves bearing personal messages, many from across east Kent shared their special memories together at these festive events. The hospice also collaborates with other venues in the community, holding services in in Barham, Charing, Cheriton, River and New Romney, allowing more people to attend.
Ellie Cane, Pilgrims Hospices Individual Giving Officer, said: “During the pandemic we were unable to bring everyone together in person, so we were delighted to welcome everyone back to our hospices this year for the return of our remembrance services. Our thanks go to everyone who has donated to the Trees of Love appeal and dedicated a dove in memory of their loved ones. At what can be a difficult time of the year, sharing thoughts with others who have similar experiences keeps our loved ones firmly in our hearts.”
She added: “So far, we have raised over £47,000 for local hospice care from generous donations to the Trees of Love appeal. This is such an amazing amount, which will help us continue to provide our expert care and support on our wards and in people’s own homes. It really will make the difference for our patients and their families when they need us the most.”
Visitors to the hospice services on Saturday 3 December 2022 were welcomed by the charity’s Spiritual Care Leads at Thanet and Ashford, and guest Lead Rev Stefan Thomas at Canterbury, to enjoy readings from staff and volunteers, and sing carols accompanied by local choirs. Refreshments of mince pies, hot chocolate and mulled wine were on offer to keep guests warm on that frosty night.
Of the combined community and hospice effort it takes to host these events every year, Ellie said: “Our thanks must extend also to our local communities and the many volunteers who give their time and skills every year to make the events run smoothly. It really couldn’t be done without them.”
Each year, Pilgrims Hospices give care and comfort to thousands of people in east Kent who are coming to terms with an illness that sadly cannot be cured. The charity support patients to live life as well as possible until the very end, free from pain and distress.
30th November 2022
Trees of Love return to Pilgrims Hospices
Pilgrims Hospices’ Trees of Love remembrance services have seen over 1,000 local people join together each year in memory of their loved ones to raise vital funds to support the incredible services that Pilgrims offers.
Trees of Love is an important event for many families who come together with others who may have shared similar experiences, to remember their loved ones. Guests are invited to come along to see their dedicated dove on one of the Trees of Love, listen to festive and remembrance readings and sing carols, whilst enjoying a warm mince pie, hot chocolate or mulled wine.
“Christmas is a special time of year for families and friends to come together, but losing a loved one can make celebrating this time of year very difficult.
“Trees of love is a place for all to come together in remembering their loved ones during the festive season. We are thrilled to be able to invite everyone back to our hospices for our remembrance services, which we have been unable to host due to the restrictions in place during the pandemic.
“We will also be releasing a Trees of Love film again as we understand how important this has become for those who choose to remember at home.”
Trees of Love has been an important fundraiser for the hospice for more than 25 years, helping to care for those living with life-limiting illnesses and support their families after they are gone.
It offers a space for anyone throughout east Kent who has lost someone special to join together, to reflect and remember their loved ones year on year.
Trees of Love events will take place at our hospices in Ashford, Canterbury and Thanet at 5pm on Saturday 3 December 2022.
We also offer indoor services with seating across our east Kent community:
Firmager, St Nicholas Church, New Romney, 1:30pm on Saturday 3 December 2022
St Peter and St Paul Church, River, Dover, 4pm on Sunday 4 December 2022
All Souls Church, Cheriton, Folkestone, 5pm on Sunday 4 December 2022
Barham Crematorium, Barham, 4.30pm on Thursday 15 December 2022
Charing Crematorium, Charing, 4.30pm on Friday 16 December 2022
You can also post a message and a photo in memory of your loved one on our online Trees of Love memory wall.
If you or someone you know is coping with a life-limiting illness and you think you may benefit from Pilgrims free services, talk to your GP or Healthcare Professional about your options or click here to read about our Wellbeing Programme.