Penny praises Pilgrims Hospices as “a place to live, a caring community”
Penny Murphy from Tenterden was diagnosed with colon and liver cancer in 2020 and given 18 months to live; she began treatment and surpassed her initial prognosis.
In January 2023, Penny decided to stop treatment to focus on her quality of life and make the most of the time she has.
Pilgrims Hospices is now supporting Penny to live well in each moment and plan for her future, enabling her to spend more time making precious memories with loved ones.
A former nanny, Penny is described by friends as “beautiful, incredibly funny, silly, adorable, and an absolute ‘one-in-a-million’ lady”. They are currently running a GoFundMe campaign to help Penny tick important goals off her bucket list, including a trip to Italy with her husband, John.
Penny said: “I’d been living with cancer for two and half years before I was referred to Pilgrims. I was so isolated at home. I dreaded the idea of hospice care, but when I arrived for my first holistic assessment, it didn’t feel like a place to die – it is a place to live, a caring community. I was greeted so warmly. The reception staff knew who I was and who I was there to see.
“Pilgrims sorted everything for me, they are so helpful and compassionate. I was able to speak with someone immediately; the whole team is efficient. I met Alison Wiltshire, Community Nursing Team Leader and Palliative Specialist Nurse (PSN), and we discussed my history and sorted out my disability badge, benefits, pain medication and future wishes. It’s the first time since being diagnosed that I’ve felt in control and empowered to make decisions about my care, which is phenomenal.”
Alison Wiltshire, Community Nursing Team Leader and PSN, with Penny
A common perception of palliative care is that it takes place only on hospice wards, but the majority of Pilgrims patients are cared for within the east Kent community. In 2022-23, 2,426 patients have had input from the clinical team – PSNs, doctors and Advanced Clinical Practitioners (ACPs) – in the community, including in patients’ own homes.
Penny
Alison added: “Bringing patients into clinic allows them to discover what a hospice feels like, and can allay fears and anxiety about what hospices are. Having someone like Penny experience our community services and be willing to spread the word to encourage others is just what we need. It helps to dispel myths about hospice care.”
Penny is currently accessing Pilgrims’ spiritual care and complementary therapy services. Her dogs, Ruger and Elsa, can also come to the hospice with her.
She continued: “I’m dying – I’m under no illusion about that – but Pilgrims gives me peace of mind; it’s so reassuring knowing that my future care will be on my terms. I think this is really important.
“To anyone being offered hospice care, I would say: “Go for a visit, talk to team, try it out”. You’ll be surprised how positive it is; it’s nothing at all to be scared of.”
Pilgrims Hospices cares for thousands of local people each year, free of charge, during the most challenging time in their lives. They offer care and support in people’s own homes, in the community and in their inpatient units as well as running a 24-hour advice line.
23rd March 2023
Green family go the distance for Pilgrims Hospices
When Rosy Green from Bridge near Canterbury was diagnosed with lung cancer in October 2021, Pilgrims Hospices helped her family to make the most of their time together.
Initially cared for at the Ashford hospice, she then returned home before passing away aged 68 at the Canterbury hospice on 27 January 2022, with her family by her side.
Rosy Green
Rosy was a dedicated and long-standing volunteer within the local community, supporting several causes, including Pilgrims, over many decades.
On Sunday 1 May 2022, Rosy’s family and friends – Team Rosy – took on thePilgrims Hospices Cycle Challenge, riding 50 miles and raising more than £8,000 for local hospice care in her memory.
A much-loved wife, mother, sister, aunt, grandmother and friend
Rosy was married to her husband, Michael, for 44 years, and together they had three children: Jamie, Hannah and Georgina. She was also a much-loved sister, aunt and grandmother. Amongst family and friends and within her local community, she was known for her warm hospitality, great food and organisational skills.
Hannah said: “Mum played such a large role in our lives and we are thankful for so many things. Her friends adored her, too. These are the parts of her life that she most valued and focused all her time and energy on.
“Her dedication to her family was immense; we were always loved and supported. From wonderful school projects, creative birthday parties, summer holiday beach time, numerous clubs and sports teams, she gave us the best start to life.
“Mum had the skill to recognise and reach out to those who needed it; her lifetime of voluntary work depicts the person she was. She cared dearly about the refugee cause and gathered clothing donations, but she truly believed that charity starts on your own doorstep. If we contribute to our local community where we can, we all thrive and build a strong, caring and established community. She will be sorely missed by all.”
“Mum received incredible care”
Rosy’s diagnosis was sudden, and she was initially given just 24-hours to live – but with the right medication, her condition stabilised and she was referred to the Ashford hospice, before returning home where she was cared for by family with Pilgrims’ support.
Georgina reflected: “Mum received incredible care during her stay at the hospice. The positive energy, enthusiasm, genuine kindness and compassion were huge factors in making her well enough to go home. Mum always (and until the end) had a great sense of humour and quick wit, and staff were happy to have a joke with her. She adored them all and was acutely gratefully for her care – she really understood the process and appreciated the kindness.
“Mum had a sweet tooth, so on occasion she would have two puddings instead of a savoury meal; what a nice thing to enjoy whilst you still have an appetite.”
With a combination of physiotherapy, occupational therapy and support from the wider hospice teams, as well as her own determination to get home, Rosy became fit enough to get around with a walking frame. When she returned home, Pilgrims arranged for a suitable bed and equipment to be installed. She was able to enjoy many visitors and home comforts.
Pilgrims were such good listeners when we explained our concerns about medication, Mum’s discomfort, her wishes… whatever it was, they worked with us to achieve what was best for her. Both staff and volunteers were sincere, thoughtful and caring every step of the way.
Georgina
Pilgrims continued to support Rosy and her family with home visits, and they could contact hospice teams 24/7 to access specialist advice whenever they needed it. When Rosy’s condition deteriorated, the family decided that re-admission would be best, and she was transferred to the Canterbury hospice.
Georgina added: “Pilgrims were such good listeners when we explained our concerns about medication, Mum’s discomfort, her wishes… whatever it was, they worked with us to achieve what was best for her. Both staff and volunteers were sincere, thoughtful and caring every step of the way.”
Team Rosy’s fantastic fundraising
On Sunday 1 May 2022, a group of Rosy’s family and friends completed the Pilgrims Hospices Cycle Challenge, raising £8,181 for local hospice care.
Georgina said: “We didn’t do any special training apart from keeping on top of our general fitness. It was definitely a challenge on the day, but the countryside was beautiful and it was amazing to ride as part of a team. The t-shirts we had printed were great, too. We really felt that we were giving back and knew Mum would be proud of us, which gave us a such a strong focus whilst fundraising.
“Crossing the finish line and receiving our medals was a huge relief. Our legs were burning cycling up St. Stephen’s Hill – luckily, Dad had some battery left in his e-bike and took a lot of pleasure in finishing first within our team! I was just so happy we completed our ride without injury or mechanical malfunctions.
“Mum had always been a huge supporter of Pilgrims Hospices in her fundraising and volunteering. It’s an extremely important local charity to all of our family and friends; many of us have received their support and we believe everyone should be able to access this amazing care when the time comes.”
Pilgrims Hospices cares for thousands of local people each year, free of charge, during the most challenging time in their lives. They offer care and support in people’s own homes, in the community and in their inpatient units as well as running a 24-hour advice line.
23rd February 2023
Peter: “The word ‘hospice’ now fills me with joy”
When Peter Clampitt from Ashford was diagnosed with lung cancer, he was referred to Pilgrims Hospices. After a short stay in the hospice, Peter was able to return home, where he is now being helped to live well with the assistance of carers, home aids, and Pilgrims’ continued support.
He wanted to share his story so that others can learn about the benefits of hospice care.
Peter, a former engineer who worked across the UK and Europe, is originally from Folkestone. He has four children – Nick, Lisa, Emma and Laura – and lives in Ashford with Laura and her two daughters, Lily and Sophia.
Peter was initially admitted to William Harvey Hospital, Ashford. He said:
“I was in a very dark place, the darkest point in my life. Thankfully, the hospital team got me referred to Pilgrims. Death doesn’t frighten me, I’m not worried about it, but I did think that a hospice was a place to spend your last days – so when I first went in, I thought I wouldn’t be coming out.
All the staff have care in their eyes, they just want to look after you. The food is excellent and I had some great conversations with the hospice team; they made me feel really good. Never in all my life have I known people be so kind and caring, they always have smiles on their faces.
Peter
“But when I went through the doors, I thought: “My god, I’m in a palace”. It had an immediate positive effect on me. All the staff have care in their eyes, they just want to look after you. The food is excellent and I had some great conversations with the hospice team; they made me feel really good. Never in all my life have I known people be so kind and caring, they always have smiles on their faces. It’s unbelievable.”
“It was an exuberant experience; when I left, I felt so bubbly, I was bouncing around like an idiot. All the nurses lined up to give me kisses! It was a pleasure to go into the hospice and have my expectations completely changed. The word ‘hospice’ now fills me with joy.”
Pilgrims helped to get Peter’s pain under control and manage his symptoms, and ultimately supported him to return to the comfort of his own home with his family.
He continued: “Each day I spent in the hospice, I felt better and better. Pilgrims arranged care packages for me at home, and also helped to get accessibility aids in place, making it easier for me to do day-to-day things like using the toilet.”
Peter is also enjoying monthly reflexology treatments and would like to try out some of Pilgrims’ wellbeing groups in the future.
Hospices aren’t just somewhere you go at the very end of your life – they can also be a place you go to heal.
Peter
Due to the care Peter is receiving, he and his family are keen to support the charity. His eldest daughter, Lisa, completed the Pilgrims Way Challenge and plans to take part again in 2023. As Peter says: “If everyone helps and does a little bit, it really does make a difference.”
He added: “Hospices aren’t just somewhere you go at the very end of your life – they can also be a place you go to heal. People need to know that. Sometimes, they can heal you more than a hospital.
“My advice to anyone considering a referral to hospice care is: Take it, it’s wonderful. I kept looking at the backs of the Pilgrims nurses to see if they had wings.”
Pilgrims Hospices care for thousands of local people each year, free of charge, during the most challenging time in their lives. They offer care and support in people’s own homes, in the community and in their inpatient units as well as running a 24-hour advice line.
30th January 2023
Cate’s first year as a Palliative Specialist Nurse
Cate Gibson, from Ashford shares an insight into her first year as a Palliative Specialist Nurse (PSN) in Pilgrims’ community nursing team.
Having recently completed my first full year as a PSN, I must say it was a hugely daunting responsibility, but over the year, I’ve managed to take that responsibility and embrace it.
The community nursing team is quite different from the ward nursing team. We spend time assessing and looking after people in their own homes, within the hospice clinics and also supporting through telephone assessments. I liaise with GPs, consultants, district and community nurses, give palliative symptom support and end of life support. Whether the need is for signposting, equipment or sociological support, or all of the nitty gritty that families and patients need to talk about. It’s a vital service, and helping people to understand how to utilise our services and manage their conditions is so rewarding.
I’m based at the Ashford hospice, which I absolutely love; it’s a very special place, I’m so lucky, every time I walk in here, I think everyone is so warm and friendly, I’m so pleased to be part of the team.
My day begins as the team meets with consultants, social workers, occupational therapists and various teams to discuss patients and get to know them really well, they are not just a name.
I’m based at the Ashford hospice, which I absolutely love; it’s a very special place, I’m so lucky, every time I walk in here, I think everyone is so warm and friendly, I’m so pleased to be part of the team.
Cate
I visit patients from across the Ashford area, from the Marshes to Folkestone, Capel and Tenterden; when travelling, I enjoy a podcast or some music and prepare for the next visit. It is so important that I’m able to give 100% of my energy to ensure I can answer all the questions and support each patient with all of their needs.
The community team collate information and share it with the specialist teams at the hospices in order to provide tailored support for each individual.
I think I always wanted to be a nurse. There are family photographs of me at about six years of age, dressed in a nurses outfit, I think I knew even then that nursing was for me. My training began as soon as I could at 18, in London at the Royal London Hospital in Whitechapel.
I worked as part of the team at William Harvey Hospital A&E department for about 15 years and then further trained as a paramedic.
When I worked in A&E, I loved the experience of not knowing what would be coming through the door next. After joining the ambulance service, I discovered that what I really wanted was more continuity, and a better experience with patients rather than seeing someone different every time.
When I’m at the hospice working, I see patients arrive for the first time for therapy sessions, as they come in and see the set up with sofas, volunteers and smiles, you can see they feel immediately safe and welcomed.
Cate
I suppose as I became older, the draw toward palliative care became stronger; both of my parents had hospice at home care from Pilgrims. First my mum some 14 years ago and more recently my dad, who died in Pilgrims Hospice Ashford in April 2020.
Dad felt completely safe being in the care of Pilgrims, the ratio of staff to patients is greater here, allowing us to really prioritise each patient’s individual needs. Dad loved the environment at Pilgrims, he loved being here, and his preferred place of death was here. As this was during COVID, we were only allowed one visitor in the building; both Dad and I were looked after here, it’s a very special place.
I wasn’t working for Pilgrims then, but it really did inspire me to think about palliative specialist nursing.
When I accepted the role at Pilgrims, I brought my paperwork to the Ashford hospice and thought, this is the first time I’ve been here since Dad was cared for here. But I knew it was the right thing to do. My colleagues from the ambulance service said that they couldn’t think of anyone better to come and do this job for Pilgrims. I’m very proud, and I know Mum and Dad are proud of me too.
I just wish I’d found this job earlier.
Cate
It’s so very different to being in a hospital environment, we are able to offer so much more to support our patients, whether it’s breathlessness management, occupational therapy, wellbeing counsellors, social workers and most importantly a 24-hour helpline. I’m a duty nurse once a week, and do a late and early shift during the week, manning the phones. I speak to people about all of the horrible things going on at home and help them to find solutions and coping methods.
Service users are always so overwhelmingly grateful of our services.
When I’m at the hospice working, I see patients arrive for the first time for therapy sessions, as they come in and see the set up with sofas, volunteers and smiles, you can see they feel immediately safe and welcomed.
Recently, I was speaking to a lady about her husband who is in our care. She said: “Cate, you are the most amazing palliative care nurse I’ve ever spoken to.”
This was very humbling and an emotional tribute to all that we do here at the hospices. There’s something about me, I’ve found my niche in nursing.
It was indeed a massive learning curve coming to Pilgrims, the job satisfaction is beyond anything I’ve ever done, I come to work each day knowing that I’m going to make a difference to someone who is in need of our special care.
Cate
Some days you have people who are more well and in an earlier stage of their illness, when others are more unwell and come by wheelchair with their partner. The role of community nurse encompasses so much, including care for the partner’s wellbeing, offering advice, speaking to siblings and doing as much as possible to help the families through such difficult times. Getting equipment and medication in place and reassuring the families. The team work not only the day shift but can be on-site until 10pm and weekend shifts too.
It’s so lovely when someone takes the time to send a little thank you note, especially during such troubled times. I feel very blessed to be able to listen to people and identify their needs, it’s a good gift to have. I am so grateful that we have this wonderful hospice in Ashford, we help so many people, and the telephone service is so important helping people to identify services that are available to support them.
It was indeed a massive learning curve coming to Pilgrims, the job satisfaction is beyond anything I’ve ever done, I come to work each day knowing that I’m going to make a difference to someone who is in need of our special care.
I think it’s a wonderful calm environment to work in, it envelopes you as soon as you walk in, whether as a patient or a member of staff, we are a great team. Knowing that the hard work you put in benefits so many people makes it a really rewarding job.
When Cate isn’t busy with her nursing role, she loves to relax with her one-year-old springer spaniel Edith, enjoying long walks, especially in the rain!
Finally, Cate added: “I love working with my colleague Dr Pia, she’s really great, very forward-thinking and proactive and keeps us all very motivated. I just wish I’d found this job earlier.”
If you’d like to find out about a career in care with Pilgrims Hospices, please visit pilgrimshospices.org/jobs.
Each year Pilgrims Hospices give care and comfort to thousands of people in east Kent who are coming to terms with an illness that sadly cannot be cured. The charity support patients to live life as well as possible until the very end, free from pain and distress.
18th January 2023
Tony and Sharon renew wedding vows with the help of Pilgrims Hospices
Tony and Sharon Reed from Ashford were married for 23 years; they had wanted to renew their wedding vows for a long time, but as Sharon says: “Life gets in the way, so we kept putting it on hold.”
When Tony became unwell with cancer and was referred to Pilgrims Hospices in November 2022, he wanted to prioritise the vow renewal to make special, lasting memories with Sharon and their wider family. Thanks to a team effort by Pilgrims’ staff and volunteers, Tony and Sharon’s wishes were fulfilled; they renewed their vows at the Ashford hospice on 16 November 2022.
Sharon first mentioned the vow renewal to Les Rood, a Reception Volunteer, who passed the message to Cat Darkins, Spiritual Care Lead, to get the ball rolling.
Cat said: “’It is a privilege to be able to facilitate important life events at the hospice. We aim to keep what is important to the patient at the centre of what we do. We want to be able to help people make special memories and live life as well as possible for as long as possible. Tony and Sharon had been considering a vow renewal for some time, so for the whole of the hospice to help make it happen made it even more special.”
Sharon and Tony with Rodney the PAT dog
Cat officiated the ceremony, which was attended by the couple’s family and friends, with Tony’s sister and brother-in-law joining via video link from France. The hospice chapel was decorated by volunteers as a surprise for Tony and Sharon, and the catering team provided sandwiches and light refreshments. Volunteer Ginny Taylor arranged flower donations from a local Tesco store. Rodney the PAT dogmade a very special guest appearance, and was a great support to Tony as he was saying his vows.
Sharon said: “We were so excited; we chose our outfits and our bouquets were made by friends. Another friend, Hayley, took photos for us. Tony loved having Rodney there; he was patting away and didn’t stop smiling all day. It was amazing, really beautiful.”
Hannah Sanders, Ward Sister, worked closely with Tony and Sharon and played a vital role in helping to organise their special day. She said: “Providing this opportunity to both Tony and Sharon to renew their vows was a privilege; I saw the love they had for each other and wanted to pull out all the stops to make their wish come true. All the staff were brilliant, and I feel very proud to be a part of such a caring and supportive team.”
Tony had his own room at the hospice complete with a Cuddle Bed, an extra wide and adaptable hospital bed that enables patients to lie next to their loved one. This allowed Sharon to stay over and be close to Tony. They also enjoyed visits from family and friends, including their daughter, Chloe, and grandson, Ethan.
Tony and Sharon in the Cuddle Bed alongside Sarah Martins, Senior Ward Sister, Hannah Sanders, Ward Sister and Cat Darkins, Spiritual Care Lead
Sharon continued: “After the ceremony, so many people came to Tony’s room for a chat, to ask how we were and see the photos. All the hospice staff and volunteers are amazing, they’re like one big family.”
Tony added: “The whole day made me really, really happy. Other patients and their families saw our ceremony going on and it brought them so much joy, too.
“Everyone at Pilgrims is wonderful. They’re so helpful and just want to do what’s best for you; they listen to your wants and needs and give amazing care. I would tell anyone being offered hospice care to jump at the chance.”
Pilgrims Hospices cares for thousands of local people each year, free of charge, during the most challenging time in their lives. They offer care and support in people’s own homes, in the community and in their inpatient units as well as running a 24-hour advice line.
15th December 2022
Natalie Sutton – Pilgrims’ first Nurse Associate
Natalie Sutton has recently qualified in a brand new role as a Nurse Associate within the nursing team at Pilgrims Hospice Thanet.
She has been a valued Health Care Assistant (HCA) within the care team for six years, her new role will be working with healthcare support workers, and registered nurses to deliver care for patients and their families. It’s also a stepping stone to becoming a registered nurse.
Natalie is 35 years old and lives with her husband James in Ramsgate, she told us that after leaving school, she went to college to study child care, and pursued a career caring for young children. Thereafter she spent a number of years enjoying a career in retail. However, in her heart of hearts, she knew that care was in her blood, but didn’t quite know which area to choose.
Natalie Sutton, Nurse Associate
After nine years with Sainsbury’s, Natalie applied to work with a nursing agency, undertaking some domiciliary roles, working in peoples’ homes and care homes, she enjoyed the role, caring for a wide variety of people over two and a half years.
She said: “While I was with the nursing agency, I looked after someone who was dying, and the colleague I worked alongside, shared her skills and knowledge with me; I learned so much about the correct procedures, and it truly sparked my interest in palliative care.
“I decided to look for career opportunities with Pilgrims Hospices. My mum is a Palliative Specialist Nurse (PSN) with Pilgrims, and when I explained how I felt, she said that Pilgrims is a great place to work, and there might be opportunities for me to find a role within the care team.
“I joined as a Health Care Assistant, and loved supporting with patients’ personal care, dietary requirements and much more. These are some of the elements that nurses don’t always have time to do in their busy shifts.
In 2019, Natalie read about a brand new role of Nurse Associate that Pilgrims were going to add to the care team. It meant going to university as an apprentice while still working. “I was really interested, especially as this would allow me to continue working while taking on the university study. I would not have been able to afford to go back to full-time study.
“I knew at this point I was really interested in taking my care career to the next level. In 2020, I took up a place to study at Canterbury Christchurch University, knowing it was a two-year programme to qualify. Pilgrims were really supportive and I completed my protected learning at the Canterbury hospice, giving me some time away from my HCA day role in Thanet, allowing me some quality time to really focus on the new training.
“Initially, I felt quite overwhelmed and I wasn’t sure if would be able to manage the training, but with my husband’s and colleagues’ support, I soon got into my stride. I trained myself to find the best ways of learning and study, and soon came to grips with the essays and assignments to complete.”
In Natalie’s new role she will be assisting the nurses with their daily jobs, including medicine management, admissions and discharges.
As the first homegrown Nurse Associate, Natalie was instrumental in the selection of the brand new uniform for the role.
“I’m really enjoying my new role, I’ve also been able to share some of my training experiences with other HCAs that may encourage them to consider the opportunity. I’m always happy to share my experiences, Pilgrims are hoping to have a Nurse Associate at the Ashford and Canterbury sites too.”
When asked if she might consider taking her skills to the next level, and become a registered nurse she said: “Yes, perhaps in the future, but just now, I’m really enjoying my new role. Everyone here has been incredibly supportive and respectful of my new skills, I’m delighted to be part of Pilgrims’ care, we have the most amazing bond amongst our team.
“The whole team feel passionately about end-of-life care for patients and their families, and we know from personal experience that the people we care for are immensely grateful for our help.”
Kate White, Pilgrims Hospices Head of Nursing said: “I would like to say a massive congratulations to Natalie on becoming our first ‘ homegrown’ Nurse Associate! Her hard work and dedication has paid off, we are very proud of her.
“The new nursing associate (NA) role was introduced in England to bridge the gap between health care assistants and registered nurses. We hope to support further members of Pilgrims’ care team to take up these opportunities.”
If you would like to know more about care opportunities within Pilgrims Hospices, please visit pilgrimshospices.org/vacancies for more information.
Each year Pilgrims Hospices give care and comfort to thousands of people in east Kent who are coming to terms with an illness that sadly cannot be cured. The charity support patients to live life as well as possible until the very end, free from pain and distress.
Care is provided from three hospice sites in Ashford, Canterbury and Thanet as well as in patients’ own homes. To offer these services to patients and their families the charity must raise £11 million each year from the generous local community.
