Pilgrims Hospices make patient’s wedding wish come true
Elaine and Jason Edwards, a former carpenter, from Herne Bay were married in a civil ceremony at Jason’s flat on Saturday 30 July 2022. This was an extra special occasion, as Jason has motor neurone disease (MND) and is receiving support from Pilgrims Hospices.
The charity helped to make their big day possible, enabling them to create beautiful memories that will last forever.
The family is incredibly grateful for Pilgrims’ care, which frequently extends beyond its physical hospices and into the wider east Kent community.
Martyn Yates, Spiritual Care Lead and Complementary Therapist at Pilgrims, was integral in organising Elaine and Jason’s marriage.
Jason and Elaine on their wedding day
Elaine said: “Our experience with Pilgrims Hospices has been totally amazing. We had Martyn come out and see us from the spiritual care team, to help us with getting married. He was amazing. He was very informative, and due to all his help, we were married at home in Jason’s flat with a few family members and very close friends in attendance.
Martyn Yates
“Pilgrims gives us as a family help and support in ways we never imagined possible. They are on hand for help and advice 24 hours a day; it gives us peace of mind knowing that they are there throughout this hard time in our lives. It means so much to us that they are here for us. They do an amazing job, and we can’t thank them enough for all they do.”
Martyn added: “One of the really important parts of the work we do at Pilgrims is to make every day as good as it can be for both our patients and their families – so they can live their lives to the full. Our links with community agencies help us to do this; in this case, the Canterbury registrars pulled out all the stops, and between us we were able to achieve Elaine and Jason’s wishes. It is so lovely to be able to do things like this for our patients and their families.”
Pilgrims Hospices cares for thousands of local people each year, free of charge, during the most challenging time in their lives. They offer care and support in people’s own homes, in the community and in their inpatient units as well as running a 24-hour advice line.
1st December 2021
Kate’s fantastic festive fundraising in memory of dad Dennis
Kate Johnson from Herne Bay supports Pilgrims Hospices to give back to the charity that cared for her dad, Dennis Beer, at the end of his life.
On Sunday 28 November 2021, Kate joined hundreds of fellow festive fundraisers at Santas on the Bay! to remember her much-loved dad and help to ensure that other families can benefit from Pilgrims’ vital and compassionate care.
Dennis and Gill Beer with Kate’s daughter, Millie, on the toy box that Dennis made for her
‘He was valued as a person and that image will stay with me a lifetime.’
Dennis was an antique furniture restorer from Teynham; he died peacefully at home, aged 71, on 20 January 2017.
Kate said: “Dad fought a long and courageous battle against bowel cancer, exhausting all surgeries available to him and enduring multiple rounds of gruelling chemotherapy. At this point, the doctors explained that his liver wasn’t able to cope with any more treatment and that it was time to stop. It’s difficult to know how to just stop trying to get better; how do you physically and emotionally support somebody to die? It’s definitely not something I felt confident doing – I was used to my dad looking after me, not the other way around.
“Dad was a real home bod. When he was told that he was dying, he chose to receive support from Pilgrims’ Hospice at Home team. I moved back home in the final ten days leading up to his death, so that I could support my mum as she cared for Dad, but mostly so that I didn’t miss any time with him.
Dennis and Kate
“I’m so grateful that Dad was able to stay in the home that he loved, surrounded by the people he loved, at the hardest time our family has ever faced. My mum ran an intensive care unit before she retired and has vast and comprehensive medical knowledge, but says there is a huge difference between caring for patients when you’re behind a uniform and supporting the man you love as he dies. Watching Dad deteriorate knocked Mum’s confidence in her ability to care for him; the hospice staff helped to build her back up again, holding her hand and ‘having her back’ so that she felt strong enough to care for Dad.
“As a daughter, it’s very strange watching your dad die. We’d always been close; he was my hero. He was big, strong, loved us fiercely and protected us. Suddenly, he was tired, in pain, desperately sad at the thought of leaving us and needed us to look after him. It’s very hard to do that when the pain of what’s ahead feels like it’s crushing you.
“The Hospice at Home team were incredible. They seemed to know exactly when we needed them, and would always arrive with a big smile, often a warm hug and always lots of reassuring words. They treated Dad with respect and dignity – speaking to him about what he wanted, making sure that he was in the driving seat and that he had choices rather than just doing things to him. They’d laugh and joke, and in those final days they became part of our family. Dad would always thank them profusely for their time and generosity and appreciated every minute of them helping to care for him.
Dennis
“On the evening of 20th January 2017, the nurses arrived to see how we were all getting on. By this time, Dad was on a syringe driver and unable to communicate with us. The nurses popped the kettle on and we talked about how Dad was doing before heading into the ‘sunroom’ to sit with him. As I walked into the room, I knew his breathing was different and that something was happening. The nurses told Mum and I that Dad was dying and helped us move the bed away from the wall so that we could be either side of him, holding his hand, stroking his face and telling him we loved him as he slipped away. They stayed in the room with us until Dad had gone and comforted us whilst the magnitude of what had happened sunk in.
“Shortly after, the nurses asked us if we’d like them to dress Dad in some of his favourite clothes. We left the room for a short while and when we came back, they had dressed him in a beautiful checked shirt, sprayed his deodorant on his clothes, laid him down so he looked peaceful and snipped a sprig of flowers from a nearby plant, which they laid on his pillow, next to his head. I’ve never been so touched and overwhelmed in my life – he looked and smelt like my dad should. Even after his death, the hospice team treated him with the utmost respect and care; he was valued as a person and that image will stay with me a lifetime.”
Pilgrims helps to make life more ‘normal’
Kate’s grandmother, Elisabeth Beer, was also cared for in the Canterbury hospice in 2003. She remembers visiting her at Christmas that year:
“When we turned up, she wasn’t in her room but was instead in the chapel singing Christmas carols. We could hear her singing from outside the door. She would have been so grateful to have been able to visit church at Christmas and share a service with others; Pilgrims helped to make life just that little bit more normal for her.”
Kate’s festive fundraising journey
Kate with her mum, Gill, and her children, Millie and Harry
Kate always planned to take part in a Pilgrims’ fundraising event but knew it would mean getting fit. She said: “I’m currently in the process of joining Kent Police; as part of the interview process, I have to meet certain fitness criteria so I’ve started running.
“When I saw Santas on the Bay! pop up in my email, I sent a copy to my boyfriend joking that I’d do it because it was an excellent opportunity to raise money for Pilgrims – plus it would give me motivation to keep my fitness levels up. Next thing I know, I get an email thanking me for my entry and here I am!”
Kate is supported in her fundraising by her mum, Gill, her children, Millie (7) and Harry (3), her boyfriend, Anthony, who runs with her every week, and her friends. Her dad remains a constant source of motivation, too:
“I wouldn’t have wanted to let him down by backing out of this! My mum says how proud he’d be of me.”
On the day itself, Kate and Anthony joined hundreds of fellow Santas who braved arctic conditions along Herne Bay seafront.
Kate and Anthony at Santas on the Bay! 2021
Kate added: “It was such a lovely event and so touching to see so many people braving the freezing cold to raise money for such a worthy cause. I’ll definitely be signing up again!”
Dennis with Kate’s daughter, Millie
She continued: “The pain of losing somebody you love is unbearable. When that person needs you to help them die, how do you do that? Pilgrims helped us to help my dad pass comfortably, peacefully and with respect. It’s so important to me that other families are offered the services and support that were so vital to us during that time.
“I want to raise awareness of such an amazing cause, encourage others to sign up for similar events, have fun and learn about other people’s stories and the people who mean so much to them. Most importantly, I want to raise money so that others can experience the care my dad received.
“Finally, it’s just a lovely way to remind everyone that Dennis Beer was very much here. A big, talented man with rough hands from working hard. A principled, funny, problem solver who had a story for every occasion. He was the best dad I could have ever had, and I will always be so proud to be his daughter.
“He was a real person, he was loved so, so dearly and he will never be forgotten by us. It’s so nice to be able to speak about him and say his name.”
Each year Pilgrims Hospices give care and comfort to over 2,500 people in east Kent who are coming to terms with an illness that sadly cannot be cured. The charity support patients to live life as well as possible until the very end, free from pain and distress.
15th July 2020
Sarah and ‘Tony’s Team’ think on their feet for Pilgrims
“It’s been one year since we said goodbye to Tony, my stepfather, to lung cancer. I cannot tell you how much the resource and support of Pilgrims Hospices, Canterbury meant to us, and Tony, during 2019. The hospice was absolutely invaluable and nurses, doctors and staff were there for us through the toughest time.”
On Sunday 12 July 2020, Sarah should have been stood at the start line of the Herne Bay 10k; a local running event organised and hosted by @InvictaEastKentAC. The decision to run in the Herne Bay 10k as part of #TeamPilgrims was a straight forward one for Sarah, she said: “I chose to run the Herne Bay 10k this year as it encompasses the place Tony lived and loved with my mum during his final years. We had so many happy memories at the Hampton Park and at the pier crabbing; it just felt right to join.”
Sarah’s stepfather Tony
Unfortunately, like many events across the country, due to COVID-19 the local running event was cancelled for the safety of the participants, volunteers and the local community. Sarah didn’t let this stop her though. Along with ‘Tony’s Team’, a group of friends who fundraise together for Pilgrims in memory of Tony, they ran their very own Herne Bay 10k; same route, same day, same purpose! They even received well-deserved medals and certificates when they crossed the finish line
We were determined to not let COVID-19 affect our important fundraising event.
Sarah
When asked why they chose to do their own Herne Bay 10k Sarah said: “To go through losing someone during a pandemic is unthinkable. Pilgrims Hospices need our support now more than ever. They have lost income from many fundraising events and their shops and yet, they will still be helping countless families through their darkest hours. In the August of 2019, we set up ‘Tony’s Team’ and challenged ourselves to cycle 25-miles at Divas on Wheels. We were overwhelmed to raise £747 in memory of Tony for Pilgrims Hospices. We are aiming to raise £500 this year, but would love to round off the total amount raised for Pilgrims, from both events, to £1,500 if we can!”
‘Tony’s Team’ have not only reached their target, but have smashed it! Generous friends and family have come out in full force to support them, and have helped them raise £914 for their Herne Bay 10k. This means that their total raised for Pilgrims Hospices is £1,661!
It is thanks to people like Sarah, and ‘Tony’s Team’, that we are able to care for over 2,500 patients each year, whether this is in one of our three inpatient units in Ashford, Canterbury and Margate, or in patient’s own homes. The money raised by ‘Tony’s Team’ could cover the cost of our community care teams at one of our sites for just over 24 hours
Sarah, and ‘Tony’s Team’, are fundraising for Pilgrims to ensure that future families can receive the dedicated care and support that theirs did at such a difficult time. Of their fundraising Sarah said: “We were determined to not let COVID-19 affect our important fundraising event. We had family and friends supporting along the route to cheer us along! This is such an important cause. We are thrilled to have still managed to raise awareness and important funds for Pilgrims Hospices during this time. We are lucky to have Pilgrims Hospices in east Kent and together, we can keep it supporting other families in need.”
This year alone, Pilgrims Hospices has to raise £11 million through voluntary donations in order to run our full range of services. Sponsorship raised through events like these helps us to continue caring for local people at the end of their lives.
3rd June 2020
Su and Zahra White walk with their memories along the Hadrian’s Wall Path
The month of June is a special time of year for Su and Zahra White, and this year they’ve chosen to walk with the memories of a very dear mum and nanny, as they challenge themselves to hiking 88-miles to raise funds for local hospice care by taking part in Pilgrims Hospices Hadrian’s Wall Path Virtual Hike.
In 2015, Su’s mum and Zahra’s nanny, Hazel Riddlesden, learnt that her cancer was now terminal. After being moved into a local care home in Herne Bay, the Pilgrims Hospices Hospice at Home Team began to support Hazel and her family to ensure she continued to live life well in mind, body and soul. The family were told that Hazel was now entering the final days of her life and together, they’d need to decide on the next steps. It was at this point that Hazel asked to be admitted to Pilgrims Hospices for her final days.
Mum asked to be admitted to Pilgrims Hospices in Canterbury as she felt they would provide the peaceful surroundings she wanted to live out her final days.” Su
Hazel spent 5 days with Pilgrims Hospices in June 2015, and the family received an overwhelming level of support and care from the nurses and the wider staff. At such a difficult time, this support enabled the family to spend Hazel’s final days together. Of the care they received, Su White said:
“I knew very little about hospices or the support they provide, but can honestly say that for the wider family it was like someone had taken away all the day-to-day stresses and wrapped all of us in a comfort blanket where we felt safe, and unconditional support. My daughter, Zahra, who was just 8 years old at the time, was very close to her wonderful nanny and she was included in the support given which was very important to us”
After spending so much time inside the house during lockdown, Su and Zahra were attracted to the Hadrian’s Wall Path Virtual Hike as it gave them a reason to explore their local countryside and to push themselves on their daily walks. The virtual hike also naturally fits with the time of year that they especially remember Su’s mum and Zahra’s nanny. Su and Zahra will be walking with the memories of Hazel this June to raise much needed funds to support the nurses, doctors and wider staff who are Still Here; Still Caring for individuals, and families, across east Kent who are living with an incurable illness.
The beautiful seaside town of Herne Bay is home to many public footpaths, open fields, woodlands and coastal paths. Su and Zahra will be taking advantage of these stunning backdrops for their daily hikes as they edge towards their goal of 88 miles to virtually complete the historic Hadrian’s Wall Path.
Su and Zahra have set up a JustGiving page to raise funds for Pilgrims Hospices – if you’d like to support their challenge, you can do here:
Care is provided from three hospice sites in Ashford, Canterbury and Thanet as well as in patients’ own homes. To offer these services to patients and their families the charity must raise £11 million each year from the generous local community.
9th April 2020
The Heath family raise charity cheer in back garden
Richard and Joanne Heath from Herne Bay built a bar in their back garden, aptly named The Four Heath Clover. They started fundraising for Pilgrims Hospices along with friends and family who visited, in memory of Jo’s sister Julie Beal. The couple have raised £262 in the past 12 months and almost £700 since 2017 for the charity that is very close to their hearts.
Joanne’s sister Julie was cared for at Pilgrims Hospice Canterbury, after her long battle with cancer, she passed away in March 2010 aged 46 years.
We understand the importance of fundraising for this great cause.
Jo Heath
Jo said: “Having seen and experienced how well Julie was cared for in her final week with Pilgrims, we understand the importance of fundraising for this great cause. We have always been a family that love to take part in events to raise money for charity and have taken part in Pilgrims charity events and also play Pilgrims Lottery to support end of life care within our community.”
She added: “We built our home bar ‘The Four Heath Clover’ and held various fundraising days such as sports days, horse racing, ladies only and gents’ only nights. Everyone who attended always gave generously. Julie was a much loved sister, daughter, mum and auntie; she was always the life and soul of a family gathering.
“We do this in memory of Julie and to raise money to help Pilgrims Hospices to continue the wonderful work they do for the east Kent community.”
Leila Ilkhan, Pilgrims Community Fundraising Manager, said: “It was lovely to meet Richard and Jo and to thank them personally for their support in such an ingenious and creative way.
“They also generously have a Pilgrims collection pot on their bar for extra fundraising, we are extremely grateful to everyone who makes a contribution.
Thank you for supporting in such an ingenious and creative way.
Leila Ilkhan, Pilgrims Hospices
“I think this is a great bit of fundraising and I would love to share to hopefully inspire others to think about how they could fundraise for Pilgrims.”
Please note: This fundraising took place before the COVID-19 pandemic.
If you would like to fundraise for Pilgrims Hospices in the future,the fundraising team would love to hear from you. Although much of our current fundraising activities are paused due to COVID-19, there are many ways you can still support the charity, including joining Pilgrims Lottery, giving a one-off donationor planning an event for later on this year. We hope, that in time, supporters will be filled with positive spirit and ready to think about how they can get involved when we can all join together again in creative ways such as The Four Heath Clover.
Thank you again. Your support is very much appreciated!
This year alone, Pilgrims Hospices has to raise £11 million through voluntary donations in order to run our full range of services. Sponsorship raised through events like these helps us to continue caring for local people at the end of their lives.
19th December 2019
Santas on the Run – Tri Series, a ho ho hospice success
Three jolly jogs, over three consecutive weekends, in three festive coastal towns where more than 1,500 red suited and bearded fun runners of all ages raised thousands for their local palliative care provider, Pilgrims Hospices.
Three charity Santas on the Run events took place during November and December in Herne Bay, Folkestone and Margate. The Santas ran, jogged, skipped and walked their way along the 3K or 5K routes in the beautiful coastal towns in support of the charity who provides end-of-life care across east Kent in people’s homes, within its Therapy Centres and wards at the hospices in Canterbury, Margate and Ashford.
Everyone was there for a very good Claus, including well over 150 elf volunteers who were all acting as Santas helpers on the day.
Kate Duddell, Pilgrims Fundraising Manager said: “The Santas on the Bay, (Herne Bay) started three years ago and is now well established as an important date on our supporter’s calendars, the event has raised more than £67,000 in the last two years. For 2019, early estimations show we will raise in excess of £50,000 for the Tri Series and we certainly believe in the countdown to Christmas”.
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Warm up Santas on the Seashore
Medals
Town Mayor Of Folkestone Cllr Jackie Meade
Martin Thorpe and Trisha Smith Satntas on the Harbour
Ebony Hills and Sam Hills from Folkestone with their Sri-Series medals Sants on the Seashore venue
Lord Mayor Of Canterbury Cllr. Terry Westgate with Yiannis Christodoulou
Lord Mayor Of Canterbury Cllr. Terry Westgate with Santas On The Bay! participants
The two additional fun festive runs brought a new dimension to the already popular event. The Santas on the Bay (Herne Bay) included GB athlete and Pilgrims ambassador, Yiannis Christodoulou taking part and the runners were set off by the Lord Mayor of Canterbury.
On to Folkestone Harbour Arm with Santas on the Harbour, and a new event area for Pilgrims, with two finish lines, here the magic of Christmas saw Pilgrims featured on Sunday evening TV news. Finally, in Margate, where we had Santas on the Seashore, and Santa himself in his grotto.
Our Tri challengers, who registered to take part in all three jolly jogs collected stamps in their Christmas cards at each event to be awarded their 4th and most impressive ‘gold present’ Tri-Series medal for completing all three.
“It was just the thing to get the whole family, neighbours, friends, schools and work colleagues into the festive spirit whilst raising vital funds for local hospice care this Christmas.” Kate added.
We are totally in debt to our wonderful supporters for helping Pilgrims to stage such a fun filled Tri Series.
Kate Duddell, Pilgrims Hospices
Supporters with sleighs, buggies and wheelchairs also joined in the fun with this inclusive event, every £1 raised will be helping Pilgrims clinical team to provide the very best care for those who need it the most.
Santas big and small took part from as far afield as Northampton; Ben Ackers and his dad Tony were visiting family in Margate and decide to join and raise money for this important charity. Young Ben was the first Santa back on the day.
The fundraising teams from all three hospices brought the festive events together, involving a huge number of volunteer elves, sponsors and staff all giving their time to help the charity raise as much as possible during the festive season.
Kate said: “We are totally in debt to our wonderful supporters for helping Pilgrims to stage such a fun filled Tri Series and a lot of ho ho ho Christmas fun. Everyone’s efforts will help our team to give patients the very best care and attention at such difficult times. After all, it’s all in a good Claus! You never know which festive character will be visiting each coastal town next year.”
Pilgrims Hospices will be sharing information on all of its fabulous fundraising events for 2020 very soon. Watch out for new events and challenges appearing on Pilgrims Hospices website:
Thank you to all of our wonderful supporters, you are just amazing,
Merry Christmas!
Did you know? Pilgrims Hospices has to raise £11 million through voluntary donations in order to run our full range of services. Sponsorship raised through events like these helps us to continue caring for local people at the end of their lives.