Shirley’s story: Why I’m leaving a gift to Pilgrims in my will
Shirley Johnston has experienced first-hand the vital support provided by Pilgrims Hospices to people across east Kent. Her mum and husband both received the charity’s compassionate care at the end of their lives; Shirley decided to give back by leaving a gift to Pilgrims in her will so that other families can continue to benefit from its services in the future.
My first experience of Pilgrims was in 1985 when my mum was cared for at the Canterbury hospice. Many years later my husband, Gordon, was diagnosed with oesophageal cancer and had to undergo major surgery leaving him with a prognosis of 18 months. Despite this, he defied all odds by surviving another eight years! When his cancer eventually came back, I knew it was going to be painful for him so it was important for me that he received support from Pilgrims Hospices, just like my mum had.
It made such a difference, it was so important; Pilgrims became everything as it gave him a purpose and a reason to keep going.Shirley
He attended the Pilgrims Therapy Centre in Ashford as an outpatient for over a year, getting support with his pain, breathlessness groups, and day therapy sessions. As his carer, I was offered neck and shoulder massages as part of a pamper day. It made such a difference, it was so important; Pilgrims became everything as it gave him a purpose and a reason to keep going. He used to say “I just live at half-mast these days” but would still head into the hospice to read the paper to a friend who had trouble with her sight. When he eventually came into Pilgrims in Ashford for his last few weeks it was so peaceful. As he would have wished he was surrounded by his family at the end.
As we’d spent so long coming to Pilgrims it was like being in a family and I was quite bereft without it after he’d gone. I attended a bereavement group and saw three ladies there that I’d met through the Therapy Centre when Gordon was alive. All our husbands had been patients and had died within four months of each other – so it was a real comfort for us to be able to support each other through such a difficult time. We became great friends and even now we all come back to the hospice once a month to meet up for lunch.
Leaving a gift in my will to the hospice is as important to me as it was to my husband. I could never have cared for either my husband or my mum in the way the hospice cared for them. I’m leaving a gift to the hospice to ensure that this incredible service continues to be here for future generations, for my children and grandchildren.Shirley
After some time had passed I really wanted to fill the void of what I had lost, so I decided to volunteer as a gardener at the Ashford hospice. Every week, you will find me in the ‘wild’ garden pottering around with my friend, Sue, keeping the gardens a beautiful space for everyone to enjoy.
Gordon and I always spoke about wanting our money to be left to the hospice. When making my new will after I had spoken to my family, I split my estate six ways between my five children and Pilgrims.
Leaving a gift in my will to the hospice is as important to me as it was to my husband. I could never have cared for either my husband or my mum in the way the hospice cared for them. I’m leaving a gift to the hospice to ensure that this incredible service continues to be here for future generations, for my children and grandchildren.
By leaving a gift in your will to Pilgrims Hospices, you’ll help to ensure that each person in east Kent with an incurable illness receives the right care where and when they need it.
Download our booklet for more information or contact the team directly:
- Telephone: 01227 782 062
- Email: giftsinwills@pilgrimshospices.org
Please note: This story was written before the COVID-19 outbreak. For current information about all hospice services at the present time, including visiting our hospices and volunteering, please click here.